Constraint >>H.S

Chapter 51

This week had been a living hell. The medication was now done and my body felt like it was soon done too. All the medicine made my body feel like jelly.

Today thought felt a little better. Me and Harry could finally got to leave for absence so I could spend some time at home before hell would actually come for me. The ride home were very quiet and I ended up just resting my head against the glass window. The doctor came in the other day and told me that the results that they had been giving was that I had been having this cancer growing in me for some months and they asked me if I ever felt pain or trouble with my breathing and I actually have.

Harry was kind and brave enough to drive us home to my house were Anne and Robin were at the time while Gemma was out buying us something to eat. It was so cute and kind of them to take care of me,even if I didn't want them too.

The nasal prongs in my nose tickets as it pushed out oxygen into my lungs which made it a 100% easier to breath,without it I would faint because lack of oxygen. I didn't like it though,I was unfamiliar with the feeling and I my wasn't comfortable at all.

Harry parked perfectly outside my house and jumped out from the car and walked over to my door and helped me out. I smiled weakly and yawned.

"Thanks" I kissed him and held onto his hand tightly. He nodded slowly,locked the car and helped me into the apartment building.

I looks up to all the stairs and closed my eyes.
"I can carry you if you'd like me too?" I couldn't help but to giggle at his adorable option and shook my head.

"No...no I can do this,I want to do this" Harry gave me an unsure look and bite his lip hard.

"No...no I can't let you do that love" he whined and shook his head. I sighed out and looked down in my hands.
"Fine...okay just tell me if you need help" he finally agreed and I happily promised him.

I made my way up the stairs in a slow but not to slow motion and it went pretty good all the way up. Yes I was almost out of my breath but I made it.
Harry smiled with worry and proudness glimpsing through his eyes and smile.

"You're doing amazing..." I thanked him by a chuckled and a deep breath out. He opened up my door and helped me inside my small apartment.

The hall were now filled up with Anne's,Gemma's and Robins jackets and shoes and a amazing smell of chicken. Harry helped me to take of my jacket and shoes and placed them perfectly next to Anne's and his own.

"Alli?" I could hear Anne's voice say while walking If from the kitchen and out to the hallway,standing some meters away.
"Oh dear god..." Anne tilted her head as she walked over to me and gave me a tight but gentle hug.

"Life is so unfair..."She mumbled and placed a kiss on my forehead. I sighed out and smiled sadly at her and nodded slowly.
"How are you feeling?"

"I'm trying to accept the fact that I one day won't be here...it's hard but I am trying"

"Alli don-"

"I'm fine Harry really,you will be fine and I'll be too..." I saw in his eyes that he wanted to fight me back but he didn't,he just let me feel what I felt and that is something I really loved with Harry.

"Are you hungry love? I made some just in case" Anne smiled and stroke my back.  I wasn't even hungry,I just felt extremely tired but I wanted to make her happy since she were so kind so I just nodded and walked after Anne slowly to my kitchen were Robin and Gemma were making the last details.

"Hi love...Are you doi-"

"That's a dumb question of course she's not" Harry spit and walked me over to the table. I widen my eyes and stopped walking.

"Harry...stop it" I mumbled. He looked down to me and looked up at his family which had shocked expressions over their faces. I closed my eyes and sighed out before turning around to face them with a smile.

"Don't worry,I'm fine" I nodded and sat down by the window.

The dinner was lovely and I managed to get down a little food and thankfully Anne understood that I didn't have the power to finish it all. We all had a little chat but if I can be honestly I almost didn't hear anything they said. I just sat there and thought about life. How unfair it is,how fast it could turn from good to bad and from bad to good. For me we'll...good to bad.

I was thinking about my lovely mother and how much I missed her,at least I get to see her again hopefully... I didn't want to die,not yet.

I looked up to see Harry just looking down in his food while poking it with his fork,he didn't even eat.

"Harry...please eat" I smiled small behind the voices of Robin Anne and Gemma. He slowly looked down to me and stopped the fork from poking the chicken.
"Please?" I whispered.

He smiled sadly and tilted his head.
"Would that make you happy?" I nodded fast and smiled up at him.
He grabbed a piece of chicken and ate it slowly.

After about 5 minutes his plate were empty and his stomach full. I wanted to be like I was before;stay by the table and chat until someone almost fell asleep but I could not do that. I had to go to my bedroom with Harry for awhile and just calm my body down.

As we were lying there in each other's arms Harry placed a kiss to my temple.

"You're beautiful,how will I be able to let go?..." the words made my heart melt and crack. It was hurting to see Harry this devastated but I knew it all would end very soon.

"Harry...you will be able to let go because I want you to...I want you to find a girl that you will Marry and...have kids with. Someone that is understanding and loving. I want you to let go of me and fall in love with someone else...I don't want you to live alone and feel like you are betraying me" I shook my head.

Harry just looked at me with tears in his eyes. He shook his head fast and sobbed.

"Alli...I love you and you know I want to do anything to make you happy...but I don't know I-"

"So do that for me...now please just sleep..."

And with that we just laid there in silence,wrapped inside our own thoughts.

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I told you guys there would be 54 chapters but there might be 55 or more!