Every time I think of those long forgotten nights I weep.
I look back and punish myself for those months together.
I go back and don't recognize that person.
I wasn't myself when I was with him.
I don't want anything to do with him.
I'm not ready for another relationship.
I never was.
I have just been so god damn lonely.
So lonely that I cry when no one is with me.
Tonight feels like the first time I've been lonely in so long.
All of summer I've been around people and had people there and I've been fine.
I always rely on people to cheer me up and make me feel better.
So I've been with my friends for so much of this summer.
And now that I'm finally alone...
It's awful.
My heart dreams of the romance I want in my life.
Romance that has been long forgotten.
I miss it.
I want to feel that love again.
The pure kind of love.
But now that I look back...
I don't think I really know what love is.
All I was taught was how to be sexual.
How I should sexually attract people.
So I guess I really don't know what true love is.
It hurts when i put it that way.
But I guess it's true.
And the more I think the more shitty my writing gets
And the worst my flow becomes
And the more writers block I get.
YOU ARE READING
Lost
Random****WARNING**** This has really emotional problems going on in my life and reflects my personal thoughts. This might be triggering to some people. I promise. I will NOT kill myself. These are just personal thoughts that occur to me when I'm in my da...
