i don't think i will feel so in love with someone ever again.
No matter how toxic or awful it really was,
i will never get that innocence back.
i am not the person i was then.
no matter how much guilt and regret i feel,
nothing is allowed to ever be the same.
i was naive and gullible and oblivious.
i have never trusted someone so much.
i have never felt so much betrayal and pain.
it saddens me that more than a year later and it still gets to me.
it still affects my trust and everyday thought.
i love this new boy so much.
i feel so comfortable and safe.
but it scares me so much.
i am vulnerable and i am simply waiting for something to go wrong.
i am constantly in the shadow of fear that i will mess up or he will lose interest.
out of so much betrayal and fear,
i won't let myself love you as much as i know i am capable of.
you are my fresh start.
i don't want you to know my mistakes.
i love you.
YOU ARE READING
Lost
Random****WARNING**** This has really emotional problems going on in my life and reflects my personal thoughts. This might be triggering to some people. I promise. I will NOT kill myself. These are just personal thoughts that occur to me when I'm in my da...
