Don't Let Me Go

Chapter 11

Chapter 11

The recovery takes a long time. Many visits from Mother, Prim and my best friend Gale before the doctors think I am mentally and physically stable enough to leave the hospital. They have made sure I gained weight also because of the loss of so much during the arena.

Peeta spends many days and nights in my hospital bed although it just doesn’t feel private enough to do anything more than cuddle. The nightmares are fresh and double as bad as they were after the 74th hunger games, but when I awake and feel the presence of Peeta in my arms I always know things are going to be okay.

President Snow is the very opposite of happy, he has Johanna and Beetee in the capitol somewhere, being tortured I suspect. I don’t know what is going to happen next. I don’t know whether the uprising is going to stop or get more extreme. And I don’t know what is going to happen about next year’s hunger games. I suspect Peeta and I will have something to do with it if we are not killed or tortured by Snow before then.

“So the public marriage is on hold” Peeta walks into the room “Haymitch said that the public are dying to know what happened to me and you and the other tributes.” “Oh okay” I say. “And the uprising?” I ask. “It is very extreme. Many people of the capitol demand the stop of the hunger games entirely.” “Wow” I whisper thinking that all this happened due to me not thinking through the trick with the berries. All the people who are dying daily due to the upraising, the uprising that I myself started without even thinking it as an act of defiance.

Everyone seems to be congratulating me but I still don’t feel that well. Maybe the doctors are right, I have mental and physical problems. Or maybe just the thought of how it is all my fault for all these tragic deaths is pushing me out of my mind.

“You are free to leave Miss Everdeen” says the doctor calling for the nurses to unstrap me and unattach the drip.

“Hey Katniss” says Peeta who is waiting outside the ward door for me. I jump into his arms and hold him for a few minutes. I haven’t been out of bed for ages and although I have seen Peeta, because he was with me practically every day it just wasn’t the same as being in his strong, genuine arms.

“So what happens now?” I whisper into Peeta’s ear “They’re taking us to District thirteen as we speak, you’ll be seeing your mother and Prim” he says smiling. “Oh Peeta” I say knowing how hard it must be for him, going there with no family to greet him back. “I’m always here for you” I say and he sad smiles.

“PRIM” I scream as she hurdles right onto me. We’re both in tears as I stroke her hair and cradle her back and forth for a while. It must have been a few months that have passed since our last seeing of each other. Well they visited me in hospital but I wasn’t exactly conscious of it.

“Oh mum” I whisper more tears flowing down my face as my mother’s fragile arms wrap around me. “We’ve missed you” she says. I smile and then I see him. My best friend. “Gale” I shriek diving right into his steadiness. “Catnip” he says laughing. I pull away shortly after, feeling the awkward tension and the envy in Peeta’s eyes forces me to back away.

I love Gale in a best friend type way, nothing more. Peeta is the one I love, I can’t help that Gale has a thing for me and proved it by kissing me before I left. I just missed my hunting partner, my partner in crime. Oh and how I miss the woods of District Twelve.

I grab Peeta’s hand and we get shown the way to our new room. “Now you two are not allowed to sleep in the same room so you are in rooms next to each other” the person tells us. Peeta looks annoyed but nods. “Katniss you will be in a room with your mother and sister” the person adds before leaving us to it. When he is out of ear shot Haymitch bursts into laughter.

I give Peeta a brief kiss and go settle down, spending well needed time with mother and Prim.

But no matter how comfy the bed is I just can’t sleep. I keep thinking I am in the arena still because in the hospital they gave me morphine to help relax me and make me sleep. But every tick of a clock or noise in the darkness terrifies me. I sneak out of the door shaking and crying thinking about the arena and what nightmares will be looming over me tonight.

I give a little knock on Peeta’s room door shaking and he opens it “Peeta” I sob falling straight into his arms. “Katniss, you can’t sleep either?” He mumbles, checking that no one is watching and pushing me into his room. “Where is Haymitch?” I say my voice still hoarse with tears. “He is asleep but we have separated rooms with beds” Peeta says blushing. “Oh” I simply add, still in tears.

“You’re alright now Katniss, you have me. I will always keep you safe” Peeta reassures me while rocking me back and forth in his arms and stroking my hair soothingly. When I’ve stopped crying I give Peeta a kiss and smile a little “thank you” I whisper. “It’s okay” he says “The clock ticking in my room reminded me of the arena” I say “Yeah.. I took the batteries out of mine and chucked it on the floor” Peeta says looking to the ground. “Good idea” I say.

Peeta leans in and gives me a kiss, it doesn’t feel like we have had much quality time together for a long, long time. When I was in the arena I really did think I would ever get any privacy with Peeta ever again.

The calm, lingering touch of his lips makes me fall back hard onto his bed, dizzy with emotion. I feel a little hesitation as he touches me, as if he is taking time to memorize this kiss before we’re apart. But I don’t want our lips to part. As if he can read my thoughts, his arms grab my waist as my legs wrap tighter and tighter into his. I am pressed into his body, the perfect fit.

I can feel Peeta’s breathe tingle my back as a shiver runs down my spine. We gradually get further down into the bed and before we realise we are under the duvet.