DIRTY LAUNDRY

03

Boy, you make a fool of my heart,
you don't know what you do to me •

I gulped and tried my best to hide the disappointment on my face. I walked to Jack's bed, then she approached me and stuck her hand out. I shook it and gave her a sour smile.

"Hey! I'm Andie, nice to meet you!" She said. Even her voice was annoying but I internally slapped myself.

"Nice to meet you too, I'm Alex." I said and just awkwardly stood there.

"I know, I've heard a lot about you." She smiled. Funny, I didn't even know she exists, but of course I didn't say that out loud.

"Yeah? I'm hoping nice things." I fake chuckled and looked at Jack. He on the other hand didn't have to fake anything. His mouth was stretched in that big beautiful smile I adore so much.

"Oh for sure! You wanna join us for a drink?" She asked, taking a seat on Jack's bed to put her high heels back on.

"Sorry, raincheck. I have some college stuff to finish." I lied. I wasn't even remotely ready to be their third wheel, besides, I prefer hanging out with Jack only.

"Awh, okay, I'll keep it in mind." She smiled. "You ready babe?" She asked him. The word babe sounded like scratching a chalkboard with fingernails.

"Yes." Jack said when he slipped his chucks on. "See you later Lex."

"Bye Alex, it was nice to meet you." She added while standing at the door.

"Likewise! See ya!" I shouted and waited until they left. Before Jack closed the door, he winked at me. Usually I'd be smitten but in that moment he only made it worse. After they left I buried my face into a pillow and tried not to cry. How come he never mentioned her? I know I had no right to be pissed at anyone but I was. I was pissed at everyone... Jack, Andie or what's her name, even the fucking janitor. But most of all I was pissed at myself, for letting it go that far in my head.

And now I have the biggest crush on Jack and he is straight and happily taken. This whole situation made me sick. Thank fuck I had no actual college stuff to work on, because I wouldn't do it anyways. I was stressed so I called mom and talked to her. It was a much better option than skyping her because I looked awful. I unfortunately can't hide the disappointment, I'm a horrible liar and faking things is just not something I'm good at. I never was. I told mom I like someone that's already taken and she had the best rational advice ever; walk it off and move on. A normal person would take that advice, I'm sure. Me on the other hand, I'm not that rational. I do think about stuff, but I also let feelings guide me, I'm an emotional person I guess. For example, when someone seriously offends me, people can see I'm offended. Even if I try hiding it, it's still very obvious. So I had no other choice but to avoid the girlfriend topic with Jack. Maybe it will go away or something, but under no circumstances is he to find out I have a crush on him.

Three hours later he was still out, I was lying in bed, covered with the duvet, watching some chick flick movie, which was a bad idea. I was trying not to think about what they are doing, since I'm a visual kind of person but I consider it to be one of my weaknesses. In an hour I was already napping, my headphones on and the movie still playing. I woke up when someone was taking my headphones off. Opening my eyes I realized that someone was Jack. He was alone. His eyes were shining and his skin was glowing as I was still lightheaded from the nap. Regardless, he still looked like an angel.

"Hey there sleepyhead." He said and giggled.

"Oh, uhm hey." I yawned and stretched my arms. "What time is it?"

"It's 10 past 9." He said and took a seat on my bed, closing my laptop. Then he put it on our desk and turned back to me.

"Where's Andie?" I asked. Whenever I heard or said her name, it felt like a needle poked through my skin.

"She went home. Did you finish school work?" Ah, that. Almost forgot about it.

"Yeah. Where did you guys go?" I asked.

"Drinks and her place. Then we went to the park." I was beyond jealous of her when he said her place, because I know what he was referring to.

"Cool." I replied. I needed to do a better job at convincing myself that I'm not affected by the fact that Jack has a girlfriend; it was starting to show.

"Are you feeling okay? You look a bit off." He asked me. Shit.

"Yeah, I just have a stomach ache, it'll go away soon." I lied, again.

"Lie down, I'll make you some tea." He offered, well... actually it was more of an order. I'd for sure get over it faster if we weren't rooming together; now this is a different story.

"Oh, y-you don't have to..." I started but his voice cut me off.

"It's not a problem, I want to. Just relax or you'll develop an ulcer by the end of this semester." He chuckled and turned on our little electric kettle. He wanted to, oh lord, how am I ever gonna stop looking at him like this.

"Are we still on for that party tomorrow?" He asked while putting two vanilla tea bags in our two mugs.

"Yeah, sure. At 8?" I was hoping it's gonna be just the two of us, but then again I better lower my expectations.

"Mhm. Did you nap enough to watch a movie with me?" He was asking me like he had to.

"Depends on which one." I joked. I'd watch anything with him. And I do mean anything.

"Home Alone?" He asked with a sour grin on his face.

"Hmm." I was pretending like I'm thinking, even though I already knew the answer. "Luckily I haven't watched that recently. So, cool."

His eyes lit up like Christmas lights and I have to say it put me in a better mood. He took out the tea bags after a few minutes and put a teaspoon of sugar in each mug.

"Here." He said and put the mugs on the desk next to my bed. Then he threw himself on the bed and cuddled up right next to me. My face instantly flushed, making my cheeks rosy. After putting the laptop on a chair, he pressed play.

We were watching the movie, drinking tea and Jack was telling me how much it all reminds him of his childhood. After an hour or so and a cup of tea, I drifted to sleep, my face buried into Jack's neck and my right hand over him.
I'm guessing he didn't mind since I woke up the next morning in the exact same position. The laptop was shut and Jack's hand was over me.

I was screaming internally.