DIRTY LAUNDRY

05

One last time for old time's sake,
One last bend before we break •

I know it's wrong to use one person to make some other person jealous but I panicked. Also, I genuinely like Lisa. If I were straight, she would definitely be my first choice. She's nice and sincere, a little shy but a very good person. I like girls like her because she's nothing like Andie. I think I'd dislike her even if her and Jack weren't together. I just can't associate with what she's about and I never could. She's loud and obnoxious, very sloppy and when she drinks she turns into this stripper and gets extremely slutty. To be honest, I often wonder how someone like Jack can even be with her. They don't have anything in common except partying. Whoopdeedoo! Marriage material. Not.
The fact that they're together really just makes me sick and Lisa seems to take my mind off things, which is what I need before I really start showing my disapproval of the Andie-Jack relationship. It's not like I'm gonna hurt Lisa, I couldn't. I will talk to her when the time is right and until then we'll just hang out and enjoy each other's company. No harm in that.

I walked Lisa to her dorm after the party and we exchanged numbers. After I returned to my room I hit the shower and crashed into bed but couldn't fall asleep. Jack was somewhere with Andie so I didn't tell him I was leaving and to be honest, it was better this way. I couldn't stand another second looking at them making out like they're alone. I seriously thought she was gonna eat him.

I browsed the net on my phone, fidgeting constantly, trying to make myself sleepy. I even read some fanfic but it didn't help. It was only 1am.
An hour later I heard the door sloppily open. The panting was getting closer and ended in a sound of Jack's body hitting the soft duvet on his bed. He kicked off his shoes and started mumbling something. I tried ignoring him.

"So, did you have a nice time with Leeheeeesa?" He said. God, he was wasted as fuck.

"Yeah, she's a really cool chick." I stated. This is why I hate drinking, some people become these weird somebodies you don't recognize anymore.

"Coolio." He mumbled into his pillow but I heard it.

"Looks like you had a nice time yourself." I said to him. I only turned to the side to put my cell on the nightstand when I felt him throw himself on my bed.

"It would be even nicer if you stayed longer." He slurred. I literally stopped breathing when he said that. His eyes were set on mine, piercing through my head.

"Uhm, I walked Lisa home. Besides, it looked like you and Andie didn't need me there." I hoped he would forget everything until the next day.

"Are you jealous, Alex?" He asked. It happened again, I stopped breathing, trying to be as nonchalant as I could even though he was drunk and there was a good chance he was just babbling stuff.

"N-no. Why would I be?" I lied when it was really eating me inside.

"Because I'm too hot to resist." He chuckled. I just chuckled back, pretending he didn't say that because oh god, it was so true.

"Yeah, sure." I then said with a sarcastic tone.

"I see the way you look at me, you don't have to pretend." He said. I just gulped and nervously chuckled, looking away and then back again. His gaze was still set on me.

"Jack, you're wasted. Come on, time for bed." I said and lifted myself up and out of bed. I went over to his side to help him move to his bed.

I bent down and stuck my hand out but instead of trying to stand up he pulled me and I ended on top of him, our faces inches apart. My heart was racing and my palms started sweating. The look in his eyes was odd, he never looked at me like that before. I held my breath and it seemed like minutes passed, not seconds.

"Jack, please go to slee-" I started but never finished because he pressed his lips on mine. I can't even describe what I was feeling in that moment but I can guarantee I haven't felt anything even remotely close, ever before. I pulled away, rolled off him to the other side of the bed and almost started crying. He was giggling and I couldn't believe this happened with him hammered like a nail.

"Jack..." I said. He cut me off again, this time by using words.

"I wanna sleep here. Good night Alex." He said, turning to the side. His arm fell over me and I had no other choice. I would have to sleep with him in my bed again.
It's not that I didn't like it, I was just afraid of what a sober conversation the next day will be like.

I woke up at 9am with Jack still passed out next to me. His breath smelled like vodka and he was sweaty as fuck. His hands weren't all over me this time, so I got up and ran out to get some coffee. I bought one for him as well. I grabbed a bite on the way and an hour later I returned to our room. Jack was sitting on his bed, his glasses on, still a bit light headed from sleeping. I felt the warmth in my cheeks, I must've blushed a bit.

"Morning." I said and closed the door behind me.

"Oh hey!" He replied. I was surprised because he didn't look hungover at all. He just looked like he woke up a minute ago.

"Here, I got you some coffee." I decided to stay as cool as possible and pretend last night's kiss never happened. If he ever brings it up, we can talk about it, but if not, I'll just keep my mouth shut.

"Thank you, that's so nice of you." He took the takeaway cup and smiled at me. I returned a sour smile.

"So what the hell happened last night?" He asked. I didn't just blush, I turned all the colors that exist in this world, hoping he didn't mean the kiss.

"Uhm, you got wasted?" I didn't know what I was doing.

"I don't remember squat. Did you get me home?" He asked, scratching his head. Now I have to say that most of me was relieved that he didn't remember any of it, but a little part of me was disappointed like never before. We shared a kiss and fell asleep together and now he doesn't remember any of it. But it was for the better, I wouldn't want to ruin any relationships.

"Uhm, I think you got home by yourself, I'm not sure." I said.

"Shit, sorry for crashing in your bed again. Did I annoy you with my drunk talks?" He chuckled. He has no idea how much I didn't care, as long as he was sleeping next to me.

"Oh, no problem, you were fine." I waved with my hand and smiled awkwardly.

"Cool. Listen, Andie texted me that her and Lisa are hanging out later and I was wondering if you wanna go out for dinner." He then asked me.

"Oh, uhm... sure. What time?" Great, that's just what I need, a double date.

"At around 7?"

"Sure, that could do." I agreed. I really didn't have any other choice, last time he invited me I took a raincheck.

"Great! I'll let the girls know." He said and walked out to the bathroom.
I threw myself on the bed and buried my face into a pillow.

Just great. Watching Jack with Andie will be even harder after that kiss last night. At least I'll have Lisa but I don't wanna hurt her either.

What have I gotten myself into?