Not Supposed To Be

~18

I tried to push him off but I wasn't strong enough. My shoulder was too sore and I was still weak from the stings and no food.

He pushed himself up and hovered over me. Worriedness covered his face. Was he worried that he hurt me after pushing me down?

"Get the hell off of me!" I yelled through gritted teeth.

I pushed at him again but it didn't even move him. His legs pinned mine down so I couldn't kick him. I tried to wiggle myself out, put that didn't work.

"I'm sorry, I just can't lose you. I can't let you leave." His right hand move to my face and he ran his thumb along my cheekbone. "I love you! I love you!"

That's the first time he's ever said that. That's the first time a boy, other than Finnick has told me they loved me.

For some reason I was mad. Why is he telling me this? Does he not understand our situation and why nothing like this should be happening?

I slapped him in the face and took his confused state to knock him off of me. Once he was off I dived for my weapons, the ax and trident, grabbed my backpack and took to the woods.

"Brook! Brook stop!" Cato shouted.

I run in the direction away from the lake and cornucopia. I looked back once to see Cato was following. He was much faster than me, since he was in better health.

I made it to a clearing when his arms wrapped around me. I dropped the trident while struggling to get out of his arms. Again I ended up on the ground with him hovering over me.

Tears streamed down my face as I tried to get him off of me. This was too hard. We can't be together. I can't watch him die or be the one to kill him.

"Stop moving! Did I hurt you? Why are you crying?"

"Cato please let me go. I can't do this. I can't watch you die."

"I'm not dying." He said and got me to stop squirming beneath him. I had my eyes squeezed shut because I couldn't look at him. "Open your eyes. I'm fine. Did you hallucinate me dying?"

"No." I said furrowing my eyebrows at him. "What are you talking about?"

"Nothing just wanted you to open your eyes. It worked just fine." He began to wipe the tears off my cheeks. "Let yourself be happy. Stop rejecting your feelings. I'll figure something out, I just need you to trust me. Ok? Can you do that?"

I nodded my head and he leaned down to kiss me. I turned my head to the side as voices sounded from the woods. It was Clove and Marvel yelling for us.

"No kissing." I whispered to him as he glared down at me.

"What? I said we were going to be happy. You said that you would trust me!"

"Get off me." I said as the voices became louder.

They were close. I didn't want Cato kissing me. I do trust him, but their is nothing he can do to save us. So, why even try?

Once I was off the ground I turned to pick up my trident but Cato grabbed my waist. He pulled me against himself and grabbed my face. His lips smashed against mine angrily. His arms tighten around me as I tried to back away. He bit down on my lip and I gasped and knotted my hands into his coat.

"Cato! Cato why did you take off!" Marvel shouted coming into the clearing.

I jumped away from Cato and grabbed up my trident. He knotted his fist in the back of my coat to stop me from running.

"No reason. Just tried to track a tribute. They got away." Cato said. "They dropped their backpack though."

He's lying for me? Why? He slipped the backpack onto his shoulder and put his arm around my shoulder. He pulled me toward Clove and Marvel who were waiting at the edge of the clearing.

"Guess the stings affected us more than we thought." He said.

~~~~

Once I finished cooking the fish Clove in Marvel went in search of the 'tribute' Cato and I 'tracked' earlier. Cato said it was the girl from five. He was still lying for me.

Cato went to relieve himself in the woods so I walked to the lake. I haven't  bathed in days. My clothes are stinky and my hair is a knotted mess.

Once at the lake I stripped to my undergarments and washed them. I laid them on branches to dry then jumped into the water. I leaned against a rock and closed my eyes.

It felt so good to be in the water. It reminds me of home, of the beaches. Swimming with Finnick and my father. Setting on the beach with Annie while I was sick, Finnick wouldn't let me swim.

I heard a splash and my eyes snapped opened. I waded away from the rock looking for the person. A pile of clothes rested near the branches holding my clothes. On top was a red coat. Cato.

I signed and swam towards my clothes. I just made it to the rocks that his clothes were placed at when his hands grabbed my waist. He turned me around and rested his hands on my hips. He was smiling and kissed my forehead.

"Cato ple-"

He smashed his lips to mine and his hands travelled to my ass then to backs of my thighs. He lifted me up and wrapped my legs around his waist. I grabbed his shoulders to stop from following backwards.

I turned my head away and he frowned. His hands caressed my thighs and he lean in again. It tilted my head back and he growled at me. I furrowed my eyebrows and he glared at me.

"Brook, stop rejecting your feelings. It's ok. Let yourself be happy."

"Why should I when I know I'm just going to die? Why should I when will never get to be together?"

"I told you I'll figure something out. I-"

"Cato there is nothing you can do!"

He pressed my back into the rock and pushed the hair off my face. Tears threaten to spill down my face. I can't cry in front of him again. I looked into his watery blue eyes. Watery? Is he going to cry too?

"Please. Just please." He said and rubbed my cheek. He rested his forehead against mine and closed his eyes.

I smashed my lips to his and wrapped my arms around his neck. He's right. Let's just be happy. Least I won't die without having my first kiss.

"I love you!" I said and he smiled and began to kiss my neck.