The Middle (GxG) (Sequel to The Beginning)

Chapter 18

-ZEE'S P.O.V-

    Trying to peptalk myself is hard as fuck. Like I know I need to talk to my mom. Yet I am afraid.
   Afraid of nothing, actually. I know for a fact she wouldn't get mad. Maybe a little sad I didn't tell her sooner... But she hasn't pried since I first told her..
   I'll do it. I'll do it today.
~You work today?
~Not til tomorrow afternoon. -Mom.
~I'm coming over.
. ... I sigh.
"Ro.. want to come to my house? I.. I.. need to do this."
"I'm here for you babygirl."
"Let me gather all my stuff so I can wash it there."
   
    We head off to my house and I am petrified. Rose drives slow to give me time to think. I squeeze her hand constantly to every little thought.
   Like how will mom react? How will she look at me? How do I even begin to tell her?
"It will be okay, Zee. I'm here. The whole way. I'm here."
   Her hand squeezed mine and I find some peace. I love her contact, I don't know how I would be able to live without her. She is my breath.
   We pull up to my house.. it's midday and the birds are chirping. But it's also so..gloomy for me.
"Are you ready?"
"Not in the slightest."
"I will hold you in my arms the whole time if that makes things better."
"It would.. it really, really would."
    We get out of the car and walk inside. Mom is in the kitchen making something. And we walk in to see her.
"Lunch?" She smiles.
"That would be great, Mom."
    After we eat in a complete silence.. I attempt to speak.
"It was.. about 5 months ago.. I had been getting a lot of attention from Jamie ... slipping into the coma. Many people would give me flowers, which is why so many would end up here.. But there was this one guy.. William.. who lingered.. I noticed he would always follow me around.. he kept getting closer and closer as the days went by.. And then one day he began touching me.. grabbing my hand in the hallway.. pulling me from Ro when we were together.. he made it seem like we were together of some sort and it made Ro distance herself... because she didn't want to get hurt.. But she never saw how many times I would have had to push him off... when school ended.. And Jamie woke up.. he kept stalking me.. every time I turned around, he was there... it got to the point where he followed me home one day... the one day I begged Ro to come over because she wasn't talking to me... But he broke in... I left the door unlocked because I thought Ro wouldn't take so long.." I held back tears. Rose's arms tightened around me. "He cornered me.. forced himself on me.. I could block the kisses he tried to make.. But Ro walked in. And only saw him lean in. I screamed after her... or so I thought. I ...was paralysed.. he.. said.. 'your little girlfriend WON'T save you now.' ...and then.. and.." I felt tears slide down my cheeks. "He.. started touching my chest... I was crying.. And trying to get away.. But his hand.. it went... he touched me.. down there.. he.... he.." I felt Rose shed tears against my shoulder. "I got away.. when he was trying..to....undo his.." I shake my head.. I can't. I cry harder, whimpering in a way.
"Did you tell this to the police?"
"As much as I could without being the cry baby bitch I am... like now."
"We can press charges. I'm going to sue him. How old is he?"
"18"
"That bastard will rot in prison." She takes my hand. "You and your sister are the most bravest warriors I have ever known. I hope you know that and know I mean it when I say I love you, Zee. No matter what, I want you to be open with me. I want you to tell me these things. I need you to tell me these things."
"I feel.. gross. Filthy. No matter how many showers I take.. I still feel.. And it's not fair to Ro. It's not fair to her. To have to wait... But she does because she loves me.. But I feel like I was taken from her.. She was my first for everything..even kiss. And .. And it's.. it's like.. I feel like.. I'm no longer good... tainted. For that one minute I couldn't do anything.. for that one minute he had his hand down there... I..I..I.... w..wasn't hers.. I never wanted to feel like I wasn't hers.. But I wasn't... I... am.. tainted.... She deserves someone who hasn't...with another.. deserves better."
"I don't. I don't care, Zee. I don't care. I want you. No matter what happened. I don't care about waiting. I don't care." Her tears warm against my skin.
"I'm going to take care of this. Okay? We will fix this. Things will get better, sweetie." She brings and kiss to my hand.
"Forgive me..." Rose speaks into my back. "It's me that doesn't deserve you... if I would have stayed he wouldn't have. Forgive me.. Forgive me."
"I already did, Ro. Please don't cry."
    I finished my crying.. But it was because I had nothing left in me. Now I just don't want her to be crying.. she's too beautiful.
    She takes a deep breath and nods. She doesn't bring her face from my back though, I know why. But it's okay. She never likes to show her emotions to anyone else..
"I want whatever detail you can give me about him, Zee. In the long run, setting this in motion will bring you peace. I promise."
"Uh... William Groth. Highschool grad.  18. ..short brown hair about 6ft...brown almost black eyes"
   I cringed.
"Thank you." I nod to her thanks.
"Do you want anything?"
"Honestly... some sleep would be nice."
    She nods. Rose picks me up from behind and stands me up. She hides her face from my mom and we walk upstairs to my bedroom.
   Once in, I lift her chin to look at me. Though an inch taller, I still have to lean up to kiss her. But I'm not going to kiss her right now.. not yet.
   I wipe her tears that have fallen and look into her eyes.
"I'm okay. We're okay. I did it, Ro. We did it."
   She smiles small like. But it's something. I press a soft kiss to her lips, taking the salt from her tears.
   She kisses back but the kiss is short. I change my shirt and lay on the bed, she climbs in next to me and wraps her arms around my waist. Pulling me as close as she can. I rest my forehead against her chest and just listen to her heart beat... And the rise as she claims air.
   I fall asleep here. And I get no dreams, no nightmares. Just because I am in Rose's arms.

   I wake up hours later, she is still asleep but she is too beautiful to wake. I slip out of the bed without waking her and make my way downstairs. Mom is making dinner.
"Feel better?"
"A bit, yeah."
"I have a lawyer set up. And we will be having a meeting with her in a week. If you don't want to speak aloud what happened, I beg you write it down. Each detail. I'm going to put his ass behind bars. He will never touch my baby again."
    I yawn and stretch. I walk behind her and hug her. I rest my head on her shoulder.
"I love you, Mom."
"And I you. Now help me with this?"
    I help her cut the vegetables. She sets up the pork steaks and begins to cook them on the stove top.
"I've missed you here. You and your sister both. You live with someone for 18 years and never notice how much you miss them until they're on their own."
"I'm not as lucky as Jamie. I envy her in so many ways. She got lucky. She's engaged. She lives in a technical apartment with Lynn. ... I.. wish Rose would ask me... I wish we could live together."
"We do have our basement."
"Are you seriously suggesting?"
"It wouldn't bother me. I would love to spend meals with you guys."
"Wait.. are you serious?"
"Yes, Zee."
"OH MY GOD!" I yell.
    I hear a thud upstairs and it tells me Rose had fallen from the bed. I wince because of how loud it was. What would she think?
   Would she want to? Would she? I'm nervous thinking about it.
"Do you think she would even want to?"
"Both you and your sister got these girls hopelessly in love with you guys. You've done good" she laughs.
    Rose runs and then makes it to the stairs, running those too. She runs til she hits the kitchen. She's so cute.
"What happened?" She breathes heavy.
"I actually got.. some good news.. well depending on something."
"What's the news?"
"So.. Mom suggested.. that we move in...downstairs."
    Her face went unreadable.
"You're kidding?"
"I mean it." Mom speaks up.
    She doesn't answer and her face is still unreadable. But I take her silence as a no. And it's fine.
"Dinner should be done in 20. If you want to clean up a bit you can." I change the topic.
   She takes the opportunity and walks from view.
"That .. didn't really go as expected."
"It will be okay. Just give her time."
"Is it bad to feel rejected? To feel hurt?"