A Different Fate (After Allegiant-Divergent)

Chapter 18

~TOBIAS'S POV~

I run down the aisle at full speed, following Will. No, no, no, no. NO! Why is she thinking like this? What did I do? Why is she feeling this? Has she ever even loved me? Or has our entire relationship been fake? Will brings me to the door that Tris is behind. I take a deep breath. Calm down Tobias, if you go in there freaking out, she'll start freaking out to, I tell myself. I put my hand on the doorknob and turn, pushing open the door, and Will giving me a pat on the back. Sitting down on a chair in the far corner of the room, I see a small girl with golden hair that's curled, and laying on her shoulder, and wearing a swetashirt, my sweatshirt, and sweatpants.

Tris. My Tris who also seems to be crying.

She looks up when she hears the door open, and after she scans my body, seeing I am in a tux, she begins crying harder. She completely isolates herself, hiding her face in my hoodie, and just sobs. It absolutely kills me to see her this hurt, this sad, this distraught. Nobody likes seeing anyone cry, but when it's the person you love, it hurts 100x more. Actually, for this it's about 500x because it's the person I love, crying because she's not sure if she loves me back. I let out a breath and pull up a chair next to her and offer her the only comfort I can offer her, rubbing her back and soothingly shushing her.

After about twenty minutes of her full out sobbing, she finally calms down enough so I can catch one word she says. "Sorry".

"You have nothing to be sorry for Tris," I say, still rubbing her back. She begins crying again, but a lot softer than she has been crying. After about another five minutes of her crying and my heart breaking, she calms down. I hear the occasional sniffle, but other than that, I think the tears have stopped. "Do you want to talk about it?" I hear a small voice come out of the hoodie.

"I want to," she says her voice shaking "but I don't know if I can hold back the tears," her voice now shaking even more.

"Then cry, Tris. Cry until there are no tears left because you and I both know we really need to talk about this." That came out a bit harsh, but it's true. Soon her blue eyes, now swollen from crying, peek out of the neck of the hoodie.

"I guess you're right," she says. Then, she begins to take herself out of the hoodie, so she's sitting normally on the chair. I take a deep breath and I ask the dreaded question.

"Why don't you want to marry me?" I ask. She opens her mouth to say something, but before anything can come out, tears spill out of her eyes. I put my hand on her leg for comfot, but all that did was make her flinch awa from my touch. Now that hut me right where it hurts, deep down in my heart. She doesn't even want me comforting her now. Tears threaten to run down my face, but I hold them in. "Just tell me what I did wrong then," I say. "Once you tell me that, I swear I will be out of your life. I promise you wont ever see me again." She quickly replies, stuttering on her words since she's so worked up.

"No-o! You did no-othing wr-r-ong! I-I'm ju-st so-o stup-pid. I just fe-el like we went to-o fa-ast, but it's my fau-ult. I fe-ell for you bec-cause you were the only one w-ho wa-as there for me when I wo-oke up," she says, now crying very hard again. Wow, I feel like I just slapped in the face. It was all fake. Everything we shared, was out of spite that she didn't have anyone else. Wait...

"Did you fall for me because I was the only one there for you, or do you think you fell for me because I was the only one there for you?" She immediately stops her crying, really thinking about it.

"I never thought of it that way," she says, "because you could be so right." She lifts up her hands and wipes away her tears. "I still don't know though, I mean now that I have that in my head, it's just confusing me more and..." she trails off.