Mad love. (Part one)

Baby, remember cheese fingers?

*Trigger warning. (i dunno what to name the trigger but it's at the end so be careful)

(Tyler) 

I smirked as I walked down the stairs. I smelled Taco Bell, my stomach rumbled. Josh walked down the stairs and stretched. He yawned as he walked into the kitchen. I walked slowly down looking at the spot where Josh was. 

"Tyler?" Josh called out snapping me out of my daze. I turned my head towards him slowly taking my eyes away from the spot.

"I'm okay" He smiled.  I walked down the stairs avoiding the spot. I kept looking straight forward, Anxiety filled my body when I got closer. I walked faster into the kitchen, Mom and Josh laughed and took sips off of their wine coolers. Josh's wine cooler was a strawberry pink lemon aid. My favorite was a coconut and pineapple one. 

"Hey baby" My mom pointed at the fridge. "Get one!" She smiled as Josh and she carried on their conversations. I rushed to the fridge, opened it and grabbed one from the top shelf, Twisted the bottle cap off and took two big gulps of it. Mom cleared her throat, I slowly looked over at her. I smiled innocently. I like how alcohol makes me feel, it gives me a warm fuzzy feeling. 

"I'm thirsty" Looking down I shut the fridge door. 

"So yeah, That was my first kiss" Josh chuckled. I scanned the kitchen for the taco bell, The brown bag of amazing was in front of Josh and mom. Sipping the wine cooler I walked to Josh, I wrapped my arms around him and rested my head on his back. His warm hand rubbed my arm slowly. 

"Joshua?"

"Yes?" He turned his head and looked at me. 

"Can you hand me my food" I kissed his cheek, He nodded and grabbed the bag and placed it beside me on the counter. 

"Thaank yoou!" I smiled and grabbed the bag. I walked to the stool across Mom and Josh. Pulling out the stool I took another sip. 

"Baby, remember cheese fingers?" Josh chuckled, I smiled and nodded. 

"Mhm," I climbed into the stool, Pulled the bag to me and pulled out my nachos and crunch wrap. My stomach rumbled loudly. I looked around for dad, we normally eat together because we both love Taco Bell. 

"Mom?" I unwrapped my crunch wrap.

"Yes, sweety?" She took a sip of what was left of her drink, got up, picked hers and Josh's empty bottles and threw them away. 

"Where is dad?" I watched her go to the fridge and get two wine coolers that were also my favorite. The flavor is lemon, watermelon, and strawberry. 

"At work" She sighed.

"Oh" I looked down at my crunch wrap and picked at the tortilla, eating the small pieces I pulled off. He always works, He doesn't spend much time with me like he used to. I make him uncomfortable I can sense it around him. I zoned out picking at the tortilla. 

*Flash Back*

"Come on baby girl!" my dad laughed as my little legs ran as fast as they could. 

"Im coming daddy!" I giggled as I ran into my dad's open arms. He held me close as my mom chuckled. 

"My sweet girl". He held me close swaying side to side.

*Another flash back starts*

My palms were covering my palms as I walked to the living room. Tyler you are going to tell them you are a trans male, your name is Tyler, not Hanna. 

"Hey Han" My mother's voice stabbed my chest. 

"Not Hanna" my thoughts repeated. 

"Mom, Dad."  Tears filled my eyes, Fear crashed over me like a wave crashing onto the shore. 

"What is it hunny?". I took a deep breath and let it out. 

"I don't feel like a girl.." My mother looked shocked, my dad's face looked confused. 

"Like a tomboy?" My mother's voice sounded unsure. I shook my head no. 

"No, I'm a boy trapped in a girls body, I'm not Hanna. I am Tyler." I sobbed.

"Baby, it's okay" My mother stood up and held her arms out walking to me. I walked to her covering my face with my sleeves. "Please don't hate me or say it's a phase".

"No it's not I understand baby" Her arms wrapped around my shaking body. I uncovered my face to see my Dad get up, Walk to the door, grabbed the keys and left shutting the door. How could he?. Does he not love me as a boy?.

*Flash back ends.*

"Tyler?" Joshua called out. I looked at him then down at my food. I picked a hole through the wrap. My pointer finger and thumb was covered in sour cream, cheese and some pieces of the beef. I wiped my hands on a paper towel. 

"Sorry" I picked up the wrap and took a bite out of it. 

"You okay?" Josh and Mom looked at me with concern. I nodded swallowing my food. I took another sip of my drink.

"Okay" Josh looked back at my mother and continued to talk. I didn't want to eat but I know if I didn't mom would think im trying to starve myself again. So I kept taking bites of the wrap and taking sips of my drink.