Mad love. (Part one)

Get over what Ty?

(I feel like no one reads this anymore eh) 

(Tyler) 

Josh gripped his hair slightly pulling it. He scoffed and paced side to side. 

"For fuck sakes Ty!" He growled. I sighed and hugged my waist. I should have never told him to just get over it. We went to his brothers grave earlier. 

"Get over it?!" He stopped and looked at me. His eyes stared into my soul, Guilt washed over me. I started to cry. 

"No! Ty no!. No water works on me!" He rushed over to me. I flinched, He scoffed.

"Oh so now I'll hurt you." He shook his head. 

"You know what Ty." He sniffled and walked to the door then turned back. "Just get over your dysphoria". My heart sank, my skin felt cold. 

"Yeah. I saw your mood change quickly. I would never say that to because I know it will hurt you. What you felt is what I felt. The feeling was likely worse. I lost my only best friend". 

"You don't even know what that feels like" I snapped. 

"Yeah. Have you lost your brother because a girl called rape because he broke up with her?!. And your own mother spread rumors!.". tears streamed down our faces. 

"Your friend Alexa, Helped kill my brother. She called rape, Then told me he was a coward. Ask her about Joshua Dun." He opened the door and walked out of the room. I covered my mouth and sobbed rushing out of the door. Josh walked down the steps I followed sobbing. Did I lose him? Just because I got tired of him being depressed. How could I feel that way?. He helped me when I had nightmares, Dysphoria, Depression, and anxiety. I am so selfish. 

"Joshua!" I cried out. He stopped. 

"I love you..." I sobbed. 

"I love you too" He walked down the stairs and out the door. I ran down the steps. I jerked the door open and ran out to him. He turned and looked at me. 

"Tyler." His voice was stern but slightly weak. "How could you say that to me?. I keep asking I know. But fuck! I helped you through nightmares. I took kicks to my wound for you!" He sobbed. 

"I know.." I walked to him. He looked at me. His eyes are so red, He looks so broken.  He turned away. 

"I'm going to Brendon" He walked to his car. 

"No... stay Josh" He opened the car door and slid in, he closed the door and started the car. 

"Joshua!" I cried out. My heart shattered I stumbled back to the garage door. My back hit the door I slowly slid down until I was sitting on the ground. I sobbed as he pulled down and out of the drive way. I closed my eyes and sobbed. 

*Flash back to the grave*

We walked past a family of four crying softly next to what looked like a  child's grave. Toy trucks surrounded the head stone. On top of it was a small ball cap hat. I looked down at my feet, Josh reached his hand out to mine as he sniffled. I grabbed his hand and laid my head on his shoulder as we walked down a hill. We walked past an elderly woman. She kissed her finger tips then placed her hand on the head stone. I don't like grave yards they are sad and depressing. Josh stopped. He kneeled down, squatting.

"Hey bro" He pulled out a small bag of Hershey kisses out of his pocket. He opened it and reached his hand into the bag. He got a hand full and carefully dropped them onto the head stone. He grabbed two. I looked down at his brothers head stone as he handed me a Hershey Kiss.

"He loved these" Josh smiled as he unwrapped one. He popped it into his mouth. 

"Can we go?" I turned slightly. 

"you can..." Josh sat down beside the head stone. "Im not leaving yet." He looked up at me squinting slightly. Rain started to fall lightly. 

"It's raining" I scoffed.

"And my brother is gone this is my only way to say hi now" He picked another kiss up. 

"I don't want to be here" I turned away and mumbled, "Get over it".

"Get over what Ty?" Josh sounded sad. 

"him! just get over it!". He got up and walked in front of me. 

"Lets fucking go then". He walked up the hill.

*Flash back ends*

My sides hurt from me sobbing so hard. Rain fell hard, it was cold. I slowly got up and walked back into the house. Water dripped from my jacket sleeves. I shivered as I took my jacket off. 

"Ding" my phone buzzed in my back pocket. I pulled it out and clicked it on. It was Josh.

J: Hey, Im staying here late.

Me: Im so sorry Joshua im so sorry.

J: Brendon is a close friend. I might spend the night.

Me: No! please don't. Come back home!. I can't be alone.

J: You will be fine... 

Me: NO!. 

J: Just get over it ty!. If I have to you have too. End of it. I'll be back tonight. I would never leave you alone. 

Me: I love you..

J: I love you too. See you later.

I turned my phone off and walked up to our room, I gently kicked the door shut as I walked to the bed. I took everything wet off of me. I was only in my boxers, My binder was soaked I didn't care about getting my other binder. The only light in the room was the lights around the bed. I pulled the plug out of the socket. The sun was setting so it was dim in the room. I laid down in the bed on Joshua's side. His smell surrounded me, I felt sadness wash over me. 

"What did you do Ty-" I cleared my throat as tears streamed down my face. I turned my head so my face was on the pillow. I sobbed hard almost yelling. I slammed my fist into the bed. 

"You idiot!" I sobbed harder, choking on my sobs I whimpered. I pulled the blanket over me as I  cried softly. I slowly drifted off into a sleep, I cried softer and softer until I fell asleep.