Mad love. (Part one)

What happened Josh?.

*Trigger Warning (Suicide talk, Self-harm, gore and schizophrenia )*

(long chapter)

(Also sorry for posting late first day of school knocked me out and I had a busy night talking to my boyfriend and talking to my mom about my first day soon I will be uploading regularly I just gotta figure out what time I have to write because I watch my two youngest sisters also after school and I clean for my mother because her and my dad work all day.  Anyway I hope school is doing well for you guys who started school and good luck!)

(Josh)

Snow fell softly onto the ground as Tyler smiled up at the sky. Lilly barked as Tyler started to run from her. He giggled as she jumped up and down, Her pink tongue always flopping out. I sighed as I sat down on the front porch stairs. I looked down at my palms, Fresh cuts from my fingernails burned from the snowflakes melting causing water to seep into my wounds. My mom called me drunk. Telling me I'm a horrible son and how I should kill myself and how my boyfriend is using me for sex. My voices don't make it better at all, I'm starting to see what I call my blurry demons. Their body is just a black shadow that is blurry with smoke rising off of them. Their eyes glow of a bright orange. I used to see them when I was twelve, They urge me to kill myself or cut myself. 

(No not a blurry face thing.) 

"Baby?" Tyler nudged my arm I jumped slightly I looked up at him. A blurry demon I named Eric smirked, his sharp teeth glowed. He crackled, He pulled his arm back he made his hand into a claw, His sharp nails pointed towards Tyler. 

"No" I screamed as he moved his hand fast towards Tyler, Ty gasped as his hand busted through his stomach. The warmth of Tyler's blood and bits of skin splattered over my face.

"Joshua!" Tyler patted my shoulder hard as I curled up into a ball on the porch. He sat down wrapping his arms around me. I cried and lifted my hand to where the wound was. I felt around on his stomach but it was perfectly fine. I pulled my hand back and my fingers were clean, No blood. I shook in fear, Eric laughed filled my ears. It hurt, how loud his laugh was, I covered my ears with my hands. I felt Tyler's hand stroke my hair as he rocked back and forth. 

"It won't stop" I sobbed hard into Tyler's chest. 

"Help, help, help, help" I sobbed. Eric's bloody claw traced the bottom of my chin, I looked up at him he grinned an ugly grin. 

"No one can help you Joshua" He laughed then disappeared. Ty held my head close to his chest as I cried. I felt so embarrassed, I'm happy Tyler's mom and dad are at work. 

"It's okay Joshua, I'm here" Ty cooed into my ear as Lilly nudged her nose into my chest. I smiled at her as I rubbed her chest. She is such a good dog, I looked up at Tyler. He was crying, I was scaring him.

"I'm sorry..." I sat up and kissed his lips softly. I cupped my hand around his cheek, He leaned his head down a bit. Our forehead's touched. 

"What happened Josh?" His warm breath tickled my upper lip. 

"I saw blurry demons... They hurt you" He slipped his hand in mine.

"They didn't hurt me, baby." He cooed. "Let's go inside" He stood up still holding my hand. I got up and walked with him. The door was still open, I guess from Tyler having to run back to me. I shut the door, My hands were kinda shaky as we walked to our room. Tyler and I decided to share my room since it has the bigger bed and more space. We have a long desk for our laptops and for my drawing. We moved the bed against the wall and put Tyler's tv on the wall in front of the bed. We watch movies every Saturday night and we get pizza. Tyler's lights are strung around the bed on the wall. It is a perfect room for me and him.  I climbed into bed as Lilly jumped up with me, she snuggled against me.  She yawned as Tyler rubbed her side, He laid beside me on his side I laid on my back. Tyler had the remote in his hand, He laid his head on my chest as he turned the TV on. 

I saw Eric in the corner of the room. Oh no not this depression shit again. This always happens to me. He always shows up first, then Oliver shows up then Kira. Yes Kira like Death Note Kira, I call him that since he calls me a bad guy and how I should just die. Like Kira in Death Note, He kills bad guys. I'm not a bad guy but my anger makes me one. Sometimes I get so angry I black out and hurt the person who makes me angry. I beat the shit out of my ex-friend, She turned on me and told everyone what I deal with and she made in front of my brother committing suicide that was the day I beat the shit out of her. 

*Flash Back*

I shut my locker after pulling my History text book out, I miss him he made the school better. Even though he had one more year I was a sophomore so I had two long years ahead of me. I felt a finger poke my shoulder. I turned around smiling thinking it was my best friend Brendon. 

(Brendon Uri is gonna be in this story!) 

Instead, I saw Alexa her pink colored hair was pulled back into a messy bun. My smile faded I looked at the two girls beside her mouth im sorry then leave.

"What do you want Alexa" I scoffed and started to walk away. She walked beside me, She used to be my best friend I don't know what happened. 

"So Daniel" She laughed. I Stopped walking and balled my fist up. 

"He killed himself right?" She tilted her head. I looked down tightening my fist. I was too angry to feel the pain in my palms. 

"Well, he is a coward!" She laughed and pointed at me. 

"Everyone! Joshua's brother killed himself because he was a coward" She placed her hand under my chin and jerked my face up so I looked at her. Everyone was staring some telling her to fuck off.

"He is a coward" She laughed. I had enough, I grabbed her book back straps and rammed her into the lockers. I slammed her hard the lockers shook and made a loud bang and she yellped.

"You are a no good slut!" I banged her again against the locker. She screamed I pulled her off against the lockers and turned her around. I grabbed a fist full of hair and pulled back then slammed her face into the locker hard and fast. Over and over again. I couldn't do anything to stop. I slammed her head against it harder then stopped. She was crying.

"You hurt him! you broke him!" I punched her side as I slammed her head into the locker again. I felt someone pick me up and slam me onto the floor. 

"Hand's behind your back" The school officer yelled. I put them behind my back.

"Don't ever call him a coward you slut!" I sobbed. She turned around and slid down the locker, Her face was covered in blood. She sobbed. The officer pulled me up hard. My feet hit the ground. He pushed me forward down the hall. 

"I fucking hate you!, You no good slut!." I kicked my legs at her as I walked she sobbed. The officer jerked me up I kept screaming "You slut". Brendon ran out of our Study Hall room and ran to me. 

"Dude!, Josh calm down!" He flipped his hair back. 

"She is a slut!" I sobbed. "It is her and mom's fault" I sobbed so hard. 

"I'll bail you out just calm down Tyler!" Brendon' voice faded as I heard loud whispering in my head. My vision blurred from tears. The cop forced me out the front doors his car was parked in front of the doors. Brendon ran out of the door and ran to his car. 

"I will pick you up!" He yelled across the parking lot. The cop walked me to the seat I ducked my head and slid into the car. I sobbed the whole way to the jail. 

*Flash back ends*.

Tyler shooked my arm. I felt tears run down my cheeks Lilly laid her head on my chest. I felt my chest get tight causing me to hyperventilate. Tyler cuddled me closely shushing me. 

"It's okay baby, it's okay".

(HOLY FOOK this chapter is 1522 words. My God. Anyway hope you enjoyed it!)