Project: Karma

74 | How We Came to Be

<Nagisa>
I just finished with my weekend tutoring and it had happened to be the afternoon already. I hopped back into my car at round 2:30 pm and made it a priority to head back home. On the way back, I noticed the familiar scenery that I passed.

It soon became an empty road with the dirt ground that I drove upon. There was no cars around and the tall trees guided the way. That was until I realized that my unconscious mind had brought me back to the RF...of my earlier days as a scientist.

It's been years. I haven't been here in so many years. I parked my car along the metal gate and saw that it was falling apart. From my understanding, they never cleared this place up.
I walked to the gate and saw that there was something grey that was poking out of the dirt. I pulled on it and with a slight tug, it came out. A uniform cap? I examined it and I remembered that there was a security guard who used to greet incoming cars. I wonder what happened to that man.

I placed the old grey cap on top of the bush and continued to proceed forward. I started feeling chilly all of a sudden and felt the eyes of another, following me. Maybe I'm just paranoid. Maybe I'm not.
This is the place where everything started. This is were I gained so many things, and lost so much at the same time.

Not before long, I made it to the destruction sight. Where the explosion happened. Clearly there was still parts of the building, parts of them. Glass shards everywhere and rubble piled all over the place.

Nostalgia started seeping into my soul and I just stared into the distance. I didn't know how I was feeling. Was it relief? Could it be joy?

"Nagisa."

I blinked and rubbed my eyes to see Koro-sensei standing alongside the masses of debris. He pearly whites gleaming at me. The white long lab coat, messy black hair that I grew fond of.

"Koro-sensei!-"

How cruel. It took me a second to realize that Koro-sensei is no longer alive. What I see is just a projection of my thoughts. It's what I desire to see.
I dropped my arm to my side and withhold the urge to run over. If I go over there, it's like I never moved on in the first place.

I looked down and caressed the bulge of my stomach, the womb that carried my baby. If this place never existed, if I hadn't had the passion for science, this happiness of mine wouldn't have been real to me. It would of been a fantasy that would lodge in the back of my brain. How utterly grateful I truly am.

This is also where Karma and I met. I giggled to myself out of reflex to how we both came to be. How our relationship started off and were it finished.
No. Our life together didn't end, it's still going.
I found myself walking towards the rubble, my feet moving on their own. There was a pull within me that wanted to reclaim what I had to move on from. This place is dear to me.

"Are you not satisfied?"

A voice startled me and I turned around to see Karma in his casual attire. How long had he been standing there?

"H-how did you know I was here?" I asked.
Karma walked closer to me and smiled.

"I guess we both had a strange feeling to visit this place." Karma held my hand, "don't get me wrong, I just came back from giving Ichiro a ride to the library." He explained.

I nodded my head and we both looked over together. I tightly grasped his hand and Karma notices how uneasy I really was. Was I having mixed feelings?

"Don't think much of it." Karma lifted my hand and kissed the fingers gently with his lips. "Think of it as a memory. Nothing more, nothing less." He tried to help me cope with the guilt of what happened to Koro-sensei, as well as everything that happened back then.

"It's quite fascinating really." I commented, "when I was 17 back then, I was so oblivious to the world." I laid my head on Karma's chest and he wrapped his arms around me. They're always warm. Karma swayed gently, rocking me side to side.

"Look at you now. You're a teacher, married, and about to have a second child. You're amazing." Karma brought up so kindly that I couldn't help but to blush.

"How about we look around?" I suggested.

"Are you sure?" Karma raised a brow.

"I'm tired of treasuring the good and running away from the bad memories. I need to accept it and realize that it made me into who I am today."

And I don't think I've ever seen such a genuine smile, that looked so relieved all this time, Karma had blamed himself for all the damage that my heart endured. I was the one who made Karma feel like his existence made me suffer.

"Karma, I love you. I really really love you."
He pulled me back into his arms.

"I really really love you too, Nagisa. Thank you."
•••••
<Nakaru>
I couldn't stop stressing over whether I was going to be an big brother for a baby brother or baby sister. Momma and Papa refuse to know the gender until the day Momma has to go the hospital herself.

I laid my head down the pillow and groaned in annoyance. I wasn't usually mad about stuff but, I can't get over the fact that I will be a big brother soon.
It feels weird. My chest feels weird and I feel sick thinking about it. Am I nervous? Ugh?!

I dug my face into the pillow and screamed. Hopefully muffling my sounds. I looked up and didn't hear the approaching footsteps of Momma or Papa. They didn't hear me.

I took the pillow and hugged it. Hugged it to death. Why am I so hung up about this? Am I excited? Overly joyed?
I gazed over at the family photo, hanging on my wall and looked at Papa.

Well...for Papa's sake, I hope it's a girl.