Pain: Her (Harry Styles Fan Fiction)

Chapter 99

Silence.

All I hear is silence. My vision is now rendered blurry and all I can hear is my heart and head beating through my ears and chest and I feel as if I'm going to pass out. The silence is still intact but everything is moving like a slow movie. Mouthed laughter of kids steals my vision as the fear fills up every vein and bubbles every drop of blood in my body, hitting my chest like a punch to the heart.

The lock on the door that has been protecting me from my unsought demons has been destroyed and are standing before me. I'm hallucinating but I can see them. I can see them laughing at my troubled life; enjoying and taking amusement out of my pain, the pain that seems to adore me. The more I think life is getting better, the more that pain mocks me and the more it does, the more it shuts me down.

"I need to use the bathroom." The silence breaks and the noise strikes me hard. In a panic with tears in my eyes, I stand knocking my notebook off of my desk while still holding the paper in my fist gripping it tightly so that it metaphorically suffocates just like my heart. Everyone stops and stares at me wondering what has gotten into this frantic girl and I'm shaking.

"Alright." Worry shades Alan's expression as he slowly walks over to me. His eyes narrow with suspicion, taking in my reaction I'm failing miserably at hiding. "What's the matter?" He whispers. The little scene I've caused has now lost the interest of the nosy kids and they continue their work while I rummage through my mind for an excuse to match my manner.

"I just, I really have to pee." A pathetic whisper replaces my confidence. Unconvinced, he stares at me. "What?" I shrug slowly hiding my hand holding the note from the Devil behind my back in hopes that he won't question it.

"You're crying." He steps closer, "why are you crying?" Normally, I would talk back to him asking why he suddenly cares about me and my tears but for some reason, I want him to know. I want him to help me and I want him to hold me like a father should but he doesn't care for me anymore, and I don't care for him.

"Period." I blurt. "I have my period. My stomach hurts." I shy away like I always do when someone asks me about it to make my acting seem more believable. He nods understandingly and steps away. Relief washes through me, only for a few seconds as the crumbling sound of the note scars my head bringing me back to the realization that I've been threatened to be killed.

"I'll write your pass." There's no time for passes, I need to get the hell out of here before I scream bloody murder.

"No, I can't. I have to go." Without taking another breath, I bolt passed the desks and push the door open, slamming it shut like an angry child and I dash down the halls.

For some reason, I can't even remember the lay out of my own school. I've walked these halls a thousand times before but I feel like I'm in an abandoned hotel and I've lost my direction. These now unfamiliar doors are confusing me and my tears flooding my eyes are doing no justice for me at all. My legs feel like a thousand tons each making it feel like I'm not running at all but rather the halls are closing in on me. I feel like I'm running away from something, mentally I am, but I feel like I'm being chased. This note is eating me alive and I've only had it for no more than three minutes and it's already killing me worst than the words inside.

A lethal feeling wires around my lungs and I can't breath.

"Whoa!" I collide into something--someone, and I stumble and fall on top of them and all I can do is scream.

"Get off! No! Let me go!" I punch and kick, slapping at the strangers chest trying to protect the little me I have left. The stranger rolls me on my back and grips my wrist, igniting more of a panic in me and I refuse to open my eyes for I'm afraid of what I'll see.