~ Jungkook ~
By the end of practice, I had came to terms with everything. No longer did I feel the need to be mad because it happened. I couldn't control the actions of others... but I can control mine.
That was Appa's favorite quote. He said it was the gamechanger during his last year in college, the same year he started the company. Those were the words he whispered to himself during the hard nights, when he wanted nothing except some way to control other's actions.
I waved bye to Hoseok, and walked the other way with Jimin. Jin was at his 'character building' job at the coffee shop so Jimin and I would just walk to Jimin's house together, and eat a snack and play videogames until Jin could come pick me up.
"Jungkookie?"
"Yeah hyung?"
"Could you maybe explain to me your whole situation a little bit more?" Jimin asked nervously, "It's fine if you don't want to, but I just want to know more."
"It's a strange thing, it's not really a mental illness, it's just an inability to deal with certain emotions. Epescially loss." I answered. "My psycologist from a few years ago said that it was kind of close to being something called 'emotional dysregulation', but I don't have enough symptoms to mean that that's it."
"So due to those... previous experiences... with the whole thing in Busan, you just find it hard to deal with the emotions attatched to loss."
"In general. There's a lot more specifics and details that come with the fainting and it's connection to alchohol." I said, "But there's also the thing with normality, and that strange smiling thing. It's just a problem with my mind and how it tends to work."
"Has it gotten better since the first time?"
"I don't know."
"Is that why your dad almost made you move back to Busan two years ago?"
"Yes."
"Am I asking too many questions?"
"A little bit. Why don't we talk about something else?"
"Okay. I'm sorry bro." He shook his head a little bit, and brushed his hair back.
"It's fine." I patted his head.
"Stoppp~" Jimin whined. "You make me feel so short."
"It's because you are."
"I'm above average."
"No you're not." I scoffed.
"Yeah, I am."
"I am!"
"No... you're seriously not."
"Eomma must have lied to me then......." he grumbled, as he pulled out his housekeys and unlocked the door to his house. "Anyways, you want ice-cream?"
"Yes." Gosh it's been so long.......
"Then shrink yourself six centimeters."
"Nooooooooooo, I want ice cream hyung!"
"I'm kidding. Go help yourself." Jimin plopped down on the couch.
