The Vampire's Prey

chapter 10

I woke up god knows how many hours later, I was woken up suddenly due to a sharp cold stinging pain on my neck where I had been bitten. I instantly opened my eyes and hissed in pain. My vision was blurred and my mind was fuzzy for a moment but then tears gathered behind my eyes the moment I found out where I was.
I was back in the mansion. In that familiar cozy living room with the fire place. I saw Aden right before me putting ice on my neck but then the tears in my eyes finally fell out once I noticed how cold his gaze was and how he completely avoided my eyes. He remained focused on rubbing ice on my neck but then he noticed me wake up so he stepped back saying, "keep rubbing that ice, do it yourself now that you are awake."
He then left the room leaving me alone to cry by myself. I can't even say sorry now, its far too late for it even if I wanted to. I can only be grateful that he brought me back but I know that I'm not forgiven. I can't even imagine how much he must hate me now. Oh how much I hate myself now, I'm disgusted by myself. Regret and guilt are burning my soul. I didn't deserve mercy, I should have been punished, he should have just left me lying in the cold dark forest to endure all the torture by myself.
I cried and I cried till I became weak again and fell back to sleep.
I woke up the next morning back in my bed. I had countless nightmares and I failed to even wake up from them. Once awake I decided to pretend nothing had ever happened, I just tried to forget it all and just go about my normal daily routine. I had to distract myself from the memories of my nightmares as well hence I let my mind shut down and like robot I went about doing the usual things. I took a bath, changed and walked down to the dining table for breakfast.
I pushed open the tightly closed doors of the dining room and found nothing but an empty dusty table before me. My whole world came crashing back down. This was enough to tell me how much Aden hated me now, how he didn't forgive me and how he doesn't care about me anymore. I felt heart broken, the pain made me feel sick and dizzy. I tried to hold back my tears as I headed to the kitchen.
There wasn't much in the kitchen but I tried to use what I had to make something for myself. I don't have any memory of me cooking and from how I was handling everything I guess I must have been a terrible cook.
I was in the middle of cooking when he passed from in front of the kitchen door, either it was a coincidence or he actually came to check on me but then he turned away and left. I wanted to call him, run after him, stop him, beg him to stay, cry to him to forgive me but I knew I didn't deserve forgiveness. Hence I failed to muster the strength to go to him or call him. I just stood there staring at his back as he walked away out of my sight. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I watched him coldly turn his back to me.
I lost appetite and I abandoned my cooking and left the kitchen. I didn't know where to go or what to do. I just sat down and cried. 'I should go to him,' I thought, 'I don't deserve forgiveness for my sins but maybe I can clear things a bit.'
I eventually used all the courage I have to go looking for him. Since it was day time I'm sure he'd be sleeping somewhere. He must have only woken up to check on me but I guess he thought I was fine cooking for myself in the kitchen. I didn't want to dare go into his bedroom so I decided to first check other places where he usually lied down. I checked the room with the fireplace and some other rooms nearby. Then I went to check the room where I last left him sleeping; the dark room with the comfy couch of his.
The door of the room was slightly open so I was careful to enter the room quietly, just in case he was there. He was! I froze as I stared at him sleeping peacefully. Oh how much I just wanted to go to him, to pet his hair, maybe touch his cold skin a little or even lie down next to him. If only I could but fear left me standing paralyzed because I know if I come to close to him he'll smell me and instantly wake up. After that I doubt he'd be glad to see me near him, he'd probably be annoyed, disgusted and angered just by the sight of me. I know he'd push me away without hesitation. Yet at the same time I just couldn't resist; I slowly stepped closer to him but only after I walked a few steps towards him, his eyes opened.
The moment he saw me he instantly sat upright and avoided eye contact. I felt ashamed and scared. I didn't know what to do, I just stood there staring at the carpeted floor. "What is it?" He asked, his voice was so indifferent and distant that it felt like a stab in the heart. "If nothing then get out!" The anger, the irritation in his voice, I can't stand it. I failed to move as tears gathered in my eyes. I should say something, it's now or never but what. I just couldn't think of what to say. "Never mind I'll just go somewhere else myself," he said as he got up.
As he walked towards the door, just as he passed from right next to me, I grabbed his sleeve and pulled his arm. "Please, I know I don't deserve forgiveness but don't treat me like this. I'll take any other punishment but don't," I cried.
"Punishment?" He said coldly as he snatched his hand back, "there is no punishment cruel enough for what you did. You think this is punishment? Do you even know how much worse you deserve!"
"It wasn't my fault," I tried to argue as tears rained out of my eyes.
"What wasn't your fault? Running away? Giving in to another vampire?"
"I had no choice...I couldn't have escaped..."
"And it would have never have happened if you hadn't ran away. What did I even do to deserve this? Do you even know how other vampires treat their prey, the things they do! I did nothing, I gave your space, your privacy, I did whatever you asked and treated you with kindness... AND WHAT DID YOU DO? Its so disgusting I have no words, I can't even look at you anymore. What you did was worse than a woman leaving her husband for another man!"
"Then why'd you bring me back. If you're so disgusted, if you hate me so much, then why didn't you just leave me there to suffer!?" I yelled back at him, except my voice was shaky and cranky.
"BECAUSE YOU'RE MINE," he yelled and his voice cracked as overwhelming emotions took over him, "you were supposed to be mine! I couldn't just leave you for other vampires to take you when I went through soo much just to have you." What did he mean by that? "Even if I hate you, I'll keep you," he then whispered in an extremely scary tone.
He was then going to turn around and leave but then I mumbled, "you never even asked me why I did it. You said all those things without even knowing Why."
"Fine then, Why?" He turned around and asked.
"Because...I was afraid."
"Afraid of what? What did I ever do to scare you so much..."
"I Was Afraid Of Falling In Love With You!" I finally yelled out making him freeze, "I didn't want to fall for you but its already too late now. Running away was a mistake, I admit it! At first it was just about being free but I was afraid of getting attached to you, I was afraid of my constantly growing feelings, I thought I could free myself from them but I...I don't even know what I'm saying, I can't even explain it right."
"Its okay...I think I get it," he said softly in monotone as he turned around and left.