Feeling This (Ashton Irwin)

twelve - dtr

It had been almost a week since that concert where I met Kathy, or who I now know as “Catty”. We had texted back and forth a few times and I invited her to one of Mikey’s house parties that was tonight. I haven’t actually seen her yet, but the last time we talked was on the phone and all you could hear in the background was her fob mom yelling her name which sounded like Catty. The nickname just kind of stuck.

Thanks to Catty though, I’ve been thinking a lot of Ashton and what I should do. We were both a little messed up - me more than a little - and stubborn little shits. I didn’t want to mess up what was happening between us.

Which at the moment was nothing.

He’s barely cast a second glance at me all night. We were hanging out at Michael’s house, he was throwing his weekly house party. I felt horrible for Mikey, he didn’t even like parties that much, and his parents were gone so much, it was like they didn’t even care about him. He just got so accustomed to throwing these extravagant house parties with illegal drugs and sweaty teenagers trying to get some before they had to go back to their boring nerdy lives that it just became an annual thing. I guess he found comfort in having people surrounded him, even if they weren’t really there for him. It was pretty sad.

Just like Mikey, I was alone and actually attended the pity party with him. We always sat close to each other, never more than a few feet from each other. Although we didn’t always talk, we communicated across the room with head nods and blank stares. He would occasionally crack a funny face that would send me to the ground crying.

I was awkwardly sat on one of the couches, a couple making out too close for my liking when I notice Michael making another face at me. However this wasn’t one of the funny ones meant to make me laugh, it was serious. He kept motioning over to the entrance of the large unlit room. I followed his eyes and they landed on Ashton who had just entered.

He was wearing that ridiculous hat that made everything think he had a bald spot and a tight pair of black skinny jeans that were a little too ripped. He wore a singlet, that showed off his muscles nicely. I could tell other girls were checking him out and it disgusted me how they were probably thinking about how they would try to get him into bed later, he was supposed to be mine.

But was he?

God dammit, I needed answers.

I suspect this is what Mikey wanted so I march right up to Ashton without hesitation and begin to drag him out of the crowded house. A few glares were shot at me from girls wearing too little clothing. They then didn’t wait to check Ashton out as we passed. I could feel Ashton’s burning eyes on me, but he never once objected. He never once complained I was grasping his wrist to hard or that I was walking too fast for him. He just obeyed, unlike I did when he was the one dragging me out of the house.

It felt like deja vu, but it felt refreshing, to be the one in control this time.

We were finally out of that god forsaken house and I let go of Ashton’s wrist, knowing that he would just follow me where I went. That was the awesome thing about Ashton, he was a lost puppy, and it was absolutely adorable.

My fingers feel the absence of Ashton’s skin and I instantly miss the contact. I nearly jump when I feel Ashton lacing his fingers through mine, tying them together. I try not to seem too excited, and keep a nonchalant act going. I don’t think it works though, because I can hear Ashton beginning to giggle behind me. Seriously, what guy giggles?

I stop walking, “Why are you laughing at me?!” I scream out to him. You can tell he’s trying to act serious and suppress his giggles, but he’s not very good at it.