She's Kind of a Disaster

23- I Want To See You

By the time that Tuesday comes around, I'm starting to miss having Shaw around and I'm quickly forgetting why we were even arguing in the first place. I mean, yeah, he said something pretty rude but I've always known that he's a bit of an asshole, that's part of his appeal. The whole 'bad boy' thing.

He's going to his fight today and I'm itching to call him, to go with him. I love the thrill that I get, doing something that I know that I really shouldn't be doing just by being there at the fights.

And then there's also the fact that seeing Shaw get all rough and tough is pretty hot.

But I'm too stubborn to call him, so I just spend the afternoon staring at my phone, hoping that he'll cave and invite me.

"What's going on with you?" Bella asks me after we've gotten out of class and decided to stop for frozen yogurt before we head back to our building.

"Nothing," I say quickly but then I backtrack and add, "Shaw and I usually hang out on Tuesdays. I know that we're not on the best of terms right now though, so I don't want to call him."

"But you want him to call you," She finishes.

"I know that it sounds stupid. We just have a good time," I try to explain to her with a small shrug.

"Alright, give me your phone."

"What? No," I object as we're walking with our frozen yogurt. She holds her hand out expectantly for my phone.

"Yes, come on, I know what to do," She insists and then before I can object, she's grabbed it out of my back pocket. I could take it back if I wanted to but I decide to just let her do this. She's better at dealing with guys than I am so I guess that I should just trust her with this.

She waits until we're in my room and sits her frozen yogurt on my desk before typing on my phone, then reads it aloud as she does so. "Plans for tonight? Sent."

"That's not going to work." He'll know that it's not me because he knows that I know that he has his fights on Tuesdays so it'd be stupid of me to ask if he has plans when I already know that he does. I don't tell Bella that though. I haven't told her that he's into the fighting, mostly because that's the first rule that he gave me about his world, not to tell anybody. I know that I should tell Bella everything, but Shaw is so closed off and the fact that he showed me that part of his life was special—to me, at least—and I can't break that trust.

"Just wait," Bella tells me and sure enough, my phone bings with a text and she picks it up and reads it to me. "The fights as usual. Coming?"

Well, I guess that ruins the whole 'keeping it a secret thing' that I was going for.

Bella looks up at me after reading that and then asks me, "The fights?"

"Yeah, he's... he's a street fighter," I admit to her. "You can't tell anybody that I just told you that, he'd absolutely kill me. Here, let me have the phone."

She hands it to me and starts eating her frozen yogurt again. "That's intense. Like, illegal fighting?"

"Yeah, it's illegal." I take the phone and text him back.

Do you want me to come?

"Wow," She says slowly. "Isn't that dangerous? Obviously, for him, but just going to that sort of thing, isn't that dangerous? Is this where you got all beat up last week?"

"Yeah, it is, but that's kind of why I like going," I shrug. "It's an adrenaline rush. And me getting into a fight was a mistake. He was really mad at me for it too, it wasn't his fault."

He texts me back quickly.

If you want to.

What do you want?