BOUND TO MY NEMESIS

The Calm Before The Storm (I) - 7

With heart stilled with fear I lied back on my bed recalling mom's last words to me, she'd held my hand entwining our fingers "Your dad and I might look happy but things don't always seem how they are" she'd began softly, "we do fight" she recalled, closing her eyes like she was warding off an ugly memory "but we resolve them before anyone gets a hint, you might love each other but marriage is built on a whole lot of patience, Sabr" she added chuckling as she shook her head, "be patient with each other, maintain the friendship you have make it stronger than it is now, having your friend for a companion is one of the keys to a successful relationship" I closed my eyes tightly, I felt like I was having an out of body experience all the advice I was given hitting me at the same time.

"Pray a lot Salma, we sometimes lose ourselves in our "happy euphoria", we forget there are bumps and potholes along the road, marrying someone you love who is also utterly in love with you isn't the end of the journey, no, that's just the beginning of a new journey and along the road comes struggles, Allah tests us in many ways and love is one of them, pray to Allah, thank Him for your blessings as well as your shortcomings, and cry to him when things are too difficult to bear" was mom aware this was going to happen?, I was brought to the house less than 6 hours ago but the problems piled on me already has me in despair, can I endure this, "love, cherish and respect him, you know how his mom holds you in high regard, don't be the cause of them drifting apart or anything if you have a problem just call me or your mom here and tell us, but I'd prefer you resolve it between each other"

"Me sunan mallam* might be my son but don't hesitate to report him, when he's in the wrong, I'll knock some sense into him"

I slowly rose from the bed vehemently shaking my head, like the idea already forming would wipe off.
With sluggish strides I walked to the bathroom, my already bulgy eyes looked like they were going to fall off, I turned the faucet cupping my palm beneath the tap, I felt a new surge of energy course through my body as I washed my limbs in ablution, my plunged heart picking up speed as I walked out of the bathroom.

I looked around the room totally clueless of where the qiblah* was, asking Dan wasn't an option, a small smiled played at the sides of my lips when I spotted my phone on the bedside drawer, I snugged it tapping on the screen like my life depended on it, my lips widened when I saw the qibla app on my phone I sighed when it directed to the secluded part of the room, in quick steps, I made it to my safe haven with my long hijab and prayer mat in either hand.

Tears welled in my eyes when the first takbeer left my lips, a sudden calmness engulfed me, my heart gently thumping beneath my palm as I started reciting the opening surah*.

In prostration, I cried my heart out voicing my fears to my Lord, seeking for protection from the evil that might come from the unknown and the strength to sail through this journey.

•°••°°•••°°°••°°••°•

I placed the saucer and cup gently on the tray then carried it on my palm and made my way to his room, reciting ayatul-kursiyy* as I ascended the stairs. I stood behind the door I presumed to be his then softly knocked on it.

I held my hand up again but thought otherwise and held the knob, I was surprised when the door opened, I silently entered the room. With Amdan I can never tell when I'm in the wrong he could say I had dragged my feet too much the noise has awoken him or I might be breathing too hard.

I held my breath as I watched his sleeping form he looked so much at peace, I sighed and placed the tray at the foot of the bed then gently tapped on his shoulder to wake him up.

He turned his eyes fluttering before it opened, "good m-mo-morning" I stuttered forcing a smile on my face, the frown he forming on his face vanished a smile replacing it, I wished I could feel my forehead to see if I was coming down with a fever or not, was this the same man I knew or he'd changed personality in the span of yesterday and today.

"Good morning sweetie how was your night?" My eyes might have looked like saucers, he shook his head chortling as he held my hand, my heart picked up speed, has Allah already answered my prayers?, "Uhm I brought you breakfast, maybe you'd freshen up so I can feed you" I uttered my eyes already twitching, what's wrong with me this morning. He pecked my inner palm then pushed the duvet from his body, my eyes closed at their own accord, I heard his chuckle then the light slam of the door.