BOUND TO MY NEMESIS

27 - Second Chance at Love ?

I clutched my tummy trying to hold in my laughter. Papa is the one getting fucking married.
GETTING A WIFE!.
My brain resonated.
I closed my eyes clenching my teeth to rein in my suddenly raging fury.
How could he?.
He left me.
I was just a kid but he did so, forgetting I was a kid and will grieve too.
He blamed me for murder and deserted me, forgetting I was his, and making Dan better then HIM.
"I cannot take this Aunty," I announced looking everywhere but at her.
"What can you not take?" She asked her brows furrowing.
I ran my tongue over my lower lip squeezing my eyes shut again.
"Ke Salma!" She bellowed, I opened my eyes to her standing from where she sat at the dinning area.
"Just because you have grown tall, developed breasts and got married doesn't suddenly make you older than us." She humphed planting her fisted hand on her waist.
I swallowed hardly wishing I could vanish from there.
Alluding to what Aunty Hauwa just said means they have discussed this already and have come to a conclusion, my greatest fear was returning to my cause of irritation.
Confrontations weren't my best forte, probably the reason why I still haven't met with dad even though he was my major problem at the moment.
"Aunty Kamillah" I called quietly, hoping she'd reason with me.
"M-m-my moo-om" I started clenching my eyes and hating the break in my voice.
Slowly I let out pent up breath, hoping it'd help ease the heaviness I felt in my chest.
"I CAN'T AUNTY!"I humphed, my breath shallow.
"Salma..." she called soothingly.
"I'll be lying if I say I know how you feel, but your family will always be your family especially your dad, Alhaji might have been the one to cater for you but even he did that because of your dad." She uttered retaking her seat and holding her chin in her right palm, her elbow planted on the neatly laid dinning table.
I looked away from her, willing my tear clogged throat to not give in.
He LEFT. And now that he is back he wants to LEAVE again.
Maybe Dad compelled him to come back, he might have surely not done what he did if wasn't related to my father but he was around, and might have do same for anyone else in a heartbeat.
He had three children who were equally in danger, two died, but that didn't make him bitter.
He had a brother, a niece and sister-in-law to worry about in addition.
Papa was selfish in his decisions then, and still is.
He forgot he had a child to look out for.
An innocent baby who had no idea about what was really happening and needed a shoulder to cry on.
Those shoulders should have been that of her father since she was more familiar with than anyone, but, she was denied that, and when she finally had him HE GOT SOMEONE ELSE!
"SALMA!"
She warned huffing, her index finger pointing towards me, "Don't make me do something we might all regret, what kind of disrespect is this?"
I turned around blinking back the tears that had gathered in my eye, to an angry Aunty Hauwa.
As she was refastening the cloth of her shigan yarbawa securing it around her waist and clapping in marvelment.
"Wato Salma you've grown wings to start disowning people, koh?" she stated the latter rhetorically, her lips tightening in a frown.
"Kamillah," she called her sister's name like they were not in the same room.
"She wants to set a rift between us and her fathers?" She asked the younger woman rhetorically in concern, her burning gaze on me.
The clog in my throat felt bigger and thicker.
"We just finished burying our mother," she huffed, squinting at me.
What did she mean?.
I lost a grandmother too.
"It's not even 40 days yet, I will call Amdan to come for you. We can't have you here, when you are much saner you can come back" she added the latter in a much calm tone.
Forgetting I was also mourning.
I lost a grandmother I wasn't really close to, courtesy, my dad and Dan then I'm denied mourning her rightfully courtesy my dad more of the man who calls himself so.

**
Green.

Recent rains made the trees look greener. Nature, dulls and brightens at her own pace. Human activities have mostly messes things for her but she still sticks to what she is best known for.
I closed my eyes, wishing all that had happened was a nightmare.
Granny was no more.
Dan's presence irked me.
Papa was annoying.
I could not wait for anyone from the house to come for me, Mom would be disappointed, I know.
I will be embarrassed in her presence but I was not ready to meet anyone yet.
She was my balm, for sure.
She will be better than Aunty Kamillah and Hauwa, but even she had a breaking point, maybe I've pushed her there already.
I looked to my left, thanking Allah again for gracing me with the one seat lane, the other lane of the V.I.P bus had two-seaters and occupying one of those means someone will have to sit beside me and maybe talk to me.
I frowned wondering if the two people conversing animatedly at my far left knew each other before getting aboard.
I turned around pushing the blinder at my side and reclining my seat, a heavy sigh escaping my lips as I finally let the weight down.
Wetness trickling down my face.
My mom's side of the family have in not so many words disowned me.