BOUND TO MY NEMESIS

11 ~ Momma Knows Best

My lids were heavily glued by eye boogers, my throat felt raw when I swallowed, the rhythmical thumping of my head and heart was the only thing I could hear, I raised my heavy hands slowly wiping the boogers from my eyes.

The pounding in my head increased as the memory of yesterday's incident crashed into my mind, I felt my face get wet but I didn't have the courage to wipe it, is it a sin to seek out my husband, even I don't know what came over me, and he called me a harlot, from all I can remember I've always been a good girl, I only associate with boys when it's necessary to, I prevent them like the plague and he dare calls me a harlot, all because I sought him out, was he not my husband after all I have rights over him as he does over me. Is this union even qualified enough to be termed as marriage we were nothing like a married couple and at this pace I don't see us getting anywhere close to that.

'What's wrong with you? are you giving up already?' a part of my mind questioned, was there anything I had in the first place?

He promised me hell on earth I was just too dumb to realise he'd act on those words. With a new surge of energy and hope I rose hurrying to the bathroom before I gave up what my gut was prodding.

I sat transfixed, it was a deja vu all over again, "If I wasn't the one who came in I'd have said you were trying to seduce me or are you?" He asked placing his semi fisted palm under his chin while flicking his index finger back and forth on his upper lip. My heart was practically boiling with rage.

My palm fisted in their own accord, "Or are you not in the mood?" he asked a sly smile on his lip, my eyes welled as he moved forward, my teeth clenched as he traced his fingers on my back, I closed my eyes holding back the tears. "I won't want my wife to go on sexual escapades you know, I've reconsidered your request" he whispered in my ear, I opened my eyes and held his gaze in the mirror, "Do you have any idea how much I despise you?" I asked hating the tremor in my voice, I closed my eyes again as he brushed his beard on my nape, "D- Dan" "shhh go with the rhythm", I held on to the knotted sash tightly as he rained kisses on my neck, "Isn't this what you wanted?" he asked when I finally garnered the strength to push him away, "I look like some cheap whore to you right? besides that's what you already said I am, but I'm not a cheap one so there is nothing here for you" his popular sly smile made a comeback "I never knew you could talk back, bravo" he muttered rubbing his hands together, he pursued me with slow strides, I stepped backwards with each stride he took, I couldn't interpret the look in his eyes but I wasn't in the mood for sore muscles.

"You've been feisty all your life, I'd say from the cradle" he gave out a humorless laugh as he trapped me between his arms "You had us all under your charm but it took a catastrophe that caused me my life for me to realise you were bad news!" he shouted the last part ramming his fist into the wall, "To think I've ever adored you shreds my heart to pieces, if I had known my stupid childhood utterances would land me in a lifetime doom I'd have remained mute all through my childhood" my insides churned at the calmness in his voice, his eyes were red with anger the veins on his head popped out, 'what was this creature before me, I thought I had figured him out but he keeps surprising me each passing day' "Relieve me of this marriage then" he burst in an hysterical laughter, horizontally circling his index finger "Repeat what you just said" "I said reli-" his cynical laughter resonated through the room "Relieving you of this sentence is like defying gravity on earth, you were forewarned and you transgressed we're in it for eternity no parole, no breaks, no nothing, just as you fill my heart with grieve I shall make your life a living hell"
I watched him saunter out of the room and couldn't help the tears from falling, 'Ya Rabbi if he is by any means married by a female jinn bring forth an outcome' I don't know if I can live this life for another month, we go a step forward and ten backwards each day, the words I had prepared to hurl at him were all glued to my tongue.

✨

I stared into my puffy red eyes, the hopeful girl I had known a few years back was slowly dying right before my eyes, my life is just as clouded as the hazy mirror I was staring at, "Your dad and I might look happy but things don't always look as they seem" mom's words rang in my ear,

"Dear Dan, I know you hate me, well, newsflash I don't like you either but for the sacredness of marriage and to fulfill the will of our parents I shall stick to you even if love might never be in the equation" I heaved a sigh unblinkingly staring back at the somewhat broken and hopeful girl who was my reflection.

My heart was not as troubled as earlier but it was not at ease either, I washed my face again and walked out of the bathroom leaving behind a pile of the troubles I had entered with.

I tapped my gallery icon and the first picture I saw had my lips tugging up *Innallaha ma'a suabirin (and indeed Allah is with the patient)" I closed my eyes holding the phone to my chest, I just need to be a little more patient, no one has ever had it and no one ever will. I was snapped out of my reverie by the chime of the phone.

I smiled at the name tapping the answer pad with quivering "Asalamu alaikum" her sweet voice salaamed, the smile on my face widened but my tongue was in no complying mood, "Asalamu alaikum, Salame are you there?" my heart swelled with joy, my eyes fluttered "Wa alaiki salam wa rahmatullahi wa barkatuhu" I replied my voice thick with emotion.

"Salmu I hope all is well?" She asked worriedly, I nodded in reply like she could see me, "You no longer love me mom, you've abandoned me" I found myself saying in a teary voice, "Ya illahi, you think I can shun my first and favorite daughter no way, I just wanted to give you time to ease into your new life" my lips tugged up "But what about dad, we no longer talk as much as we used to I miss you" I whined, she gave out a hearty laugh "We are angry at you too you've snubbed us because you now have a husband" she sighed I cleared my throat after chuckling "Mom you know you told me marriage life isn't easy right?" "Mhmm" "I want to know if you've ever fought with dad" "Fights are inevitable dear, and it's sometimes over trivial issues ....... wait are you fighting with Dan? don't worry I'll knock some sense into him" "No it's not that mom, I just keep wondering how our first fight will be like" "La ilaha illal lahu Muhammada rasululllah" I could envision her clapping her hands in wonder "kai Salma don't tell me you've been praying for you guys to fight, I'd have been surprised if you were the firstborn but Abdul Salam was born before you" my heart clenched at the mention of my twin brother, "You should never pray for that to happen, I recently read a Hausa book you know, and the genesis of their marital problem was the guy's refusal to remove his shoes outside before entering the room" I couldn't control my laughter when she said that, "for real mom?" "You'll have to read the book on wattpad before it's taken down, the title is Gidan Aurena you'll have insight knowledge on what marriage is suppose to be" "Mom I'm not a fan of these sappy love stories, especially the Hausa ones" I giggled when she tsked "Well it's not a request it's an order, download wattpad right after I end the call and go read the book if possible read everything today I'll call you tomorrow and I'll be asking you questions on all the characters" "Mom" I whined "Yes go do it now". I stared at the phone my mouth wide agape, she ended the call because she wanted me to read a book. Mom will always be mom, she wants to convert everyone to the bookworm she is, I rolled my eyes as I touched the playstore icon, I typed wattpad in the search box drumming my fingers behind the phone as I waited for it to download.

I rolled my eyes after I registered and searched for the story. My eyes widened at the description love to hate, wow, 'hold your horses dear' my conscience cautioned 'that doesn't mean you have the same problems' well maybe just maybe it might help and there's no harm in trying.

***

Mom's recommendation is so true I'm not yet married but I've learnt a lot from the book