Be Alright: Somebody To Love #6

17

Justin’s POV

         It happened so suddenly. I was down to my briefs. Madelyn matched me in just her bra and panties. We were doing good. It felt normal. It felt passionate and sexy.

         And then something happened.

         “You are so beautiful.” I whispered as my lips moved to her neck.

         “Stop!” She suddenly screamed. I immediately did as she said, looking at her for an answer. But she looked just as surprised at her outburst. “I’m sorry. I can’t,” She murmured as she ran towards the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

         “Mads!” I banged on the locked door. “Talk to me. Maybe we can talk through this.”

Madelyn’s POV

         I sat on the bathroom counter, sobbing. I wanted to hurt myself. We had been so close. We were a step away from being back to normal, and then I had to ruin it. I had yet again proven to Justin, and myself, that I wasn’t alright. As hard as I was trying, I hated to admit it.

         “Madelyn, please.” Justin had been waiting outside of the bathroom for over ten minutes. I reached and unlocked the door. Justin burst in as soon as he heard it.

         “Babe, what happened? What’s wrong?” He looked worried and confused.

         “I don’t know. I’m sorry.” I started crying more. I reached for him and he very cautiously gathered me into a hug. I wrapped my arms and legs around him, holding myself close to him. I didn’t understand what had happened. Why was I crying? All I wanted was Justin. I knew he wasn’t going to hurt me. I knew he wasn’t going to make me do anything I didn’t want to do. Yet, something inside of me was still scared.

         “Shh,” Justin did his best to try to calm me down. When he thought I was done, he lifted me off the counter and carried me into the bedroom. He laid me down on the bed and then joined me, but was careful to not get too close.

Justin’s POV

         “I’m sorry you married a crazy woman.” Madelyn sobbed. “You shouldn’t have to deal with this. You deserve so much better than this.”

         “Mads,” I wiped the tears off of her face. “I couldn’t ask for a better wife. It’s not your fault you were attacked. But now you’re dealing with it, and all I can do is sit here and feel guilty for not protecting you. You’re the one that deserves better.”

         “Don’t say that. You’re the best.” She started to calm down. For a couple of minutes we just laid in silence, watching each other as we both regained our composure. We were holding hands, but that was as much as I was going to do without her permission. I was fighting every part of my body that wanted so badly to hold her close to me.

         "It's okay. I want to." She read me like a book. She rolled over and I pulled her close, so her body was pressed against mine. I felt her tense up for a second before she relaxed.

         "Are you sure you're okay with this?" I asked, remembering what my mom said. She had warned me not to push her. Was this pushing?

         "This is the best I've been in weeks." She sighed. "I'm sorry."

“Don’t apologize. You’ve made so much progress this weekend. Look at us. We’re touching and you’re not freaking out. This is progress.”

"Who would've thought we would ever be in a place where spooning is considered progress." She laughed to herself. "I want to have sex, Justin. I really do. I know you want to have sex."