Limerence (Tom Hiddleston fanfiction)

Chapter 13

"Tom! Come here quickly?" He sighs deeply and I start laughing. 

"Interrupted again. We are terrible at this." We both start laughing, he squeezes my hand. "I'll be right back, don't move." I turn to the view of the Paris skyline, smelling his jacket, wishing we could stay up here forever. Then all of the sudden people start rushing onto the balcony at such a speed that I cannot get past the mob. 

I am barricaded against the edge of the balcony, I try nudging through the crowd of people, realizing what time it was. 

I wanted nothing more than to kiss Tom. This would be it. The moment that would set everything else into motion, I knew that this would be self-destructive and foolish considering everything, but all I knew is that if I didn't find Tom right now I would go crazy. 

"Tom! Tom, where are you?" I called, but my voice disappeared - like when you are having a nightmare and you have no voice. I felt hopeless as midnight crept nearer and Tom was nowhere to be seen. People were starting the countdown, some in French and others in English and I knew I only had seconds... 

Ten! Nine! Eight! 

"Tom! Tom?" 

Six! Five! 

That's when I felt a hand on my shoulder, but when I turned to meet his face - it wasn't Tom's. He smiled enthusiastically but I turned, poor guy, still looking for Tom. 

Three! Two! 

I stopped in the sea of people, completely alone in a crowd on New Year's Eve.

One! Happy New Year! 

The fireworks lit up the sky, the entire Paris night sky illuminated in different colours and the cheering of people. Everyone grabbed someone and kissed, others jumped up and down, but I stood frozen looking at the sky. Unable to hold the tears back any longer. I move through the crowd, with a force that takes me by surprise, but I knew I just had to leave. I searched for Tom in the dining area, at the bar and then again at the balcony but he was nowhere to be seen. I downed the last sip of my wine and grabbed my clutch. Almost running out of the building. 

I walked, I kept on walking until I had no idea where I was. Not only had I not kissed the man of my dreams at midnight on New Year's Eve, I was lost and had no idea where I was. I quickly took out my phone and called Tom, realizing his phone is with me in his jacket when it vibrated against my chest. Like it couldn't get any more depressing my phone battery died. 

Luckily there was a payphone in sight, but the only number I knew by heart was the one person I could absolutely not call. I scrolled on Tom's phone looking for a number of a cab service to no avail, unable to unlock his phone. I leaned against the glass and in a matter of seconds started bawling. 

I should never have come to Paris. What was I thinking? I can't live alone overseas, I was barely an adult and now I was lost in Paris, cold and with the thunder rumbling almost certain to get wet. I was typing in Daniel's number when a couple walked past me. I ran out stopping them, asking if they knew how to get to my street. Luckily the man spoke some English and the few French words I could easily understand - after half an hour of walking aimlessly around Paris I finally manage to find my apartment. 

When I'm inside I take my heels off, my feet blistered and freezing. When I turn towards my door, I see Tom. He is sitting against the door with his head in his hands. 

"Tom? What are you doing?" Tom looks up his face pale and distraught. "Where were you? I was worried sick! You just disappeared, I looked everywhere! And I could get a hold of you because I left my damn phone in my jacket! I didn't know if you were okay, are you okay?" He puts his hands on my arms, studying my face and then hugging me, lifting me up in his arms. 

"I'm sorry, I couldn't find you, so I left, but then I got lost and, and," I start crying again, unable to say exactly how I felt or why I did what I did. Tom grabs my clutch and unlocks my door, then pulls me to my bed and returns with a cup of tea. I'm still crying when he crouches in front of me on the floor, eyes wide. 

"You scared the shit out of me." I couldn't believe he cursed, he never cursed. He had explained thoroughly to me once how his mother would disapprove and how disappointed she'd be if she read him cursing in an article. 

"Tom, I," I'm unable to speak, so I just sip my tea. He turns on the radiator and kicks off his shoes. I watch him move up and down the room, pacing back and forth. "I can't believe we didn't kiss at midnight." is all I can manage, I mean of all the things to worry about, that was the only thing I could say out loud. 

He leaves the room. I sit there, mentally kicking myself for saying that, but when he sits next to me he has my kitchen's clock on his lap. 

"What are you doing?" he fidgets with it then places it opposite us. 

"Turning back time. It's almost twelve o'clock, see? We didn't miss midnight." He pulls me up and slowly begins counting, leaning closer after every number. "Three, two," 

And after a moment that felt like a lifetime of gazing at me, I drown in his ocean blue eyes. 

"One." He breathes as his lips melt into mine.