"What do you mean you're going shopping with them?" Niall demanded as I finished zipping my pants at the urinal.
"They invited me," I shrugged, leaning against the sinks.
Suddenly a tall thin, blonde boy walked out of one of the stalls and looked Harry up and down with disgust.
"Why are you even allowed in here?" He spat, "Students should be able to take a piss without you checking them out."
"Oh my God!" Harry cried, "Ellen Degeneras I love your work!"
Giving Harry a look of disgust the boy flipped his bangs and walked out.
"What a dipstick," Harry muttered under his breath.
"Don't worry about it man," Niall replied.
Harry rolled his eyes.
"Guys," I moaned, "What am I going to do? What are we going to talk about?"
"Hair products," Niall suggested.
"Queen B," Harry shrugged.
"You have a queen?" I asked.
"That I do," Harry replied.
"But I thought you had a president?"
"Oh my God you're hopeless," Niall moaned, "He's talking about Beyoncé."
"Is that like a fiancé?"
"Oh my god, I can't.... I can't...." Harry repeated walking away.
Trying hard not to laugh Niall followed after him with me trailing behind.
Harry led the way through the crowded hallways and outside into the pleasantly cool Early October afternoon.
Stopping under a tree Harry finally rounded on me.
"Just try not to say anything too stupid, I know that'll be a challenge for you but please try. If you buy anything make sure it's black or gray, unless it's a band tee."
"How will I know if it's a band tee?" I asked.
"Read the tag," Harry sighed through gritted teeth, "You think Katy perry is a babe but Jennifer Lawrence is your celebrity crush, you like Green day but your also a bit of a Blink man. And if you know what's good for you, you'll agree with everything out of their hair brained mouths."
"How am I supposed to remember all that."
"I don't know," Harry groaned, "Just remember the Green Day bit, and the Katy Perry part, maybe add something about wanting to see her big, big, big balloons."
"Is that intended to be some sort of sexual innuendo?" I asked.
"Yes," Harry moaned, "you are so naive it's sad."
As I opened my mouth to reply I was interrupted by a loud beep as a red concert able screeched to a stop in front of me with Michael driving, Calum sitting beside him in the passenger seat, leaving Luke in the back.
Pulling his sunglasses down his nose Michael looked me up and down, "Get in loser we're going shopping."
Shooting Harry and Niall and akward smile goodbye I crossed over to the car and got in beside Luke.
"Hey bitchatchos!" Calum greeted.
"What?" Michael snapped, rounding on him.
"I said hey bitchatchos?" Calum said nervously, almost as if it were a question.
"No, I know what you said I'm not deaf," Michael snapped, "What I want to know is why
"Oh, I thought it sounded cool," Calum mumbled, "it's bitch in Spanish I think."
"No it isn't," Michael laughed humorlessly, "I'm failing Spanish one and even I know that."
"Oh," Calum muttered.
"Just, stop talking, please," Michael laughed, before putting the car in drive and zipping out of the school parking lot, blasting some song about Jesus living in the suburbs.
Glancing back at me in the rearview mirror he then reached into the glove compartment and retrieved an extra pair of sunglasses.
"Put these on," he demanded, chucking them at my face.
Glancing around at Calum and Luke and finding them also wearing similar shades I put them on.
"Better," Michael sighed.
"So uh, why are we going to the mall?" I asked.
"Why wouldn't we go to the mall?" Luke gushed, "there's clothes, food, girls...."
"I never really thought about it like that," I admitted.
"That's what you have us for," Michael said, watching me closely in the rearview mirror.
Growing uncomfortable with his gaze I looked down and fiddled with my fingers until we pulled into a large parking structure.
-
When I used to imagine the mall I pictured gaggles of teenage girls walking around trying on clothes and laughing at nothing.
I did not however envision the new side the plastics showed me.
First we went in about a million dark, perfume satiated stores where Michael bought new black skinny jeans and several shirts, which after reading the tags, I discovered were band tees.
We then went near some girlies stores and played a game where we rated the girls going in and out on a scale from one to ten.
I thought it was kind of rude, since who are we to judge, however the plastics seemed to love it.
After that we went to the food court where we all got pizza. Michael scrubbed at his with a napkin saying he was removing the grease or something weird, making Calum and Luke quickly follow suit, and then we were back in the car.
"Where to know?" Luke asked taking a bite of the large, frosting covered cookie he had gotten on the way out.
"My place?" Michael asked.
The others nodded quickly.
"What about you Ashton are you in?" Michael asked.
"Sure," I replied.
Smirking Michael abruptly spun the wheel and swerved into a sickeningly expensive looking neighborhood.
Staring up at the massive houses I. Wonder my mouth fell open as we pulled to stop in front of the biggest.
"Is this your house?" I breathed.
"Yup," Michael answered, popping the p.
"It's incredible," I marveled.
"I know," he replied starting up the front steps leaving the rest of us to get his shopping bags.
"Welcome to Casa Del Clifford," Calum said behind me.
