"Rember what I told you?" Calum questioned adjusting his black baseball hat with the word YouTube written across it.
"Yes, no swearing, no nudity, and nothing raunchy or otherwise offensive." I repeated back.
"Wait, crap, guys it's on, it started, we're on, can they see us, is this like Skype?" Luke questioned, adjusting Charlotte on his lap, her hand, after punching the mirror, covered in Ninja Turtle band aides.
"Are we really?" I asked.
"Remember," Calum said, "No swear....."
"What's happening fuckers!" Michael interrupted, addressing the Laptop where our Twitcam audience of 213 were watching.
"Michael!" Luke hissed.
"You can't swear!" I chided, "They could be like twelve!"
"Psht!" Calum laughed, "Are you guys going to take that, your not twelve are you, hashtag Ashton doesn't know what age I am."
"This is so exciting!" Luke gushed, "They're watching us."
"What do we do?" I asked.
"I have almonds." Calum said, holding up a plastic container of the small, disgusting in my opinion nuts.
"Yeah, we don't have an food in our hotel room." Michael grumbled.
"Almonds are all you need," I said with a shrug, "The almond diet."
"Ashton!" Calum hissed.
"What?" I questioned.
"You can't say that!" Calum whispered.
"Why not?" I scoffed, "What's wrong with almonds, healthy, full of protein."
"Just stop talking." Calum sighed.
"Almonds are like fattening." Michael added.
"How about a subject change!" Calum cried, "um, if you could trade hair with anyone in the band who would it be?"
"Michael." Luke said quickly, "But not ketchup Michael, either skunk or joker."
"I'm gonna say you now Luke." Michael replied.
"I pick you Ashton." Calum replied.
"Your turn Ash." Luke said.
"I guess someone has to choose Calum." I laughed.
"Awwww." Calum sighed.
"Oh in sorry," I laughed, "I like your hair, but if I had it I'd do it completely different."
"My hair is thicker then Michael's dick.....doctor's pencil.... Aw shit that still sounded gross." Calum muttered.
"I'd cornrow it." I informed him, "Or have an Afro."
"What the hell?" Calum cried, "I'm just as white as you are!"
"Yeah no," Charlotte laughed softly, speaking for the first time, "Plot twist Calum is Asian."
"Can that be a thing?" Michael shouted, "Guys go tweet hashtag Plot twist Calum is actually!"
"Hashtag plots twist Calum is actually done with you're shit." Calum muttered.
"Guys, we're getting off topic." I cut in.
"Oh yeah, right," Calum sighed, "Basically Calum is not a....."
"Whore!" Michael interrupted, "She's a virgin."
"Michael!" Charlotte cried.
"Oh sorry, was I not supposed to say that?" Michael asked.
