Entering Destiny’s hospital room I was surprised to find her sitting up in bed staring up at the blank TV like it was on. Moving behind Michael, I slowly followed him over to her bed, where he both stood looking down at her, waiting for us to make some indication that she noticed our presence, however she didn’t even flinch.
“Des?” Michael said gently after a while.
Slowly, she turned to look at us and I winced at how exhausted she looked.
“Why….God, what were you thinking?” he demanded, weakly, before bending down and pulling her into a hug she didn’t return, however she didn’t shy away from him either.
After a moment he pulled away, sniffing and blinking rapidly, “You….you can’t do that again.” He said softly.
“Why not?” she whispered, her voice coming out strained and soft as if she were ill.
“What do you mean why not?” Michael demanded.
“Why not?” she mumbled, “I want to.”
“Why would you want to do that?” he cried, “Why would you want to leave?”
Shrugging, she looked down at her hands and played with her fingers, “No one would care.”
“Are you serious?” Michael yelped, his voice cracking, “I would! Ashton would, the other boys would, Charlie would, I’m sure Jess would, I know Regina would, your friend….”
“What friends?”
Michael looked down.
“I don’t have friends Michael,” she said quietly, “Mom doesn’t love me, do you know what she said to me?”
Glancing up at her fleetingly Michael shook his head.
“She told me not to come back,” Destiny replied, her voice wavering, “She said if I wanted to die so much I should stop talking about and just go ahead and do it.”
“What?” Michael said weekly.
“You don’t love me,” Destiny continued, “And I get it, I’m not even your real sister, I wouldn’t love me either, and you Ashton, I don’t blame any of you for not caring about me, or wanting me, or even liking me, because guess what, I don’t like me either!”
“Destiny,” I said softly, “I do care about you.”
“You don’t have to lie,” she said quietly.
“Des,” Michael sighed, fiddling with a hair elastic he wore around his wrist for some reason, “I don’t care that our parents aren’t married anymore, we grew up together, you’re the only sister I have, well besides Noel, but my only baby sister and I….. I’m getting mushy and shit but I do care about you and you’ll always be my sister.”
“Even though I ruined your career?”
“No, fuck, I should have never said that! I was angry, you know I have a temper you didn’t think I meant that right? You…. You didn’t do this because of what I said did you? I didn’t make you… try to….”
Glancing over at Michael and finding his eyes swimming with tears, I prayed he wasn’t the reason because I don’t think the poor guy could handle it.
“It wasn’t you,” she mumbled, “It was me.”
“Seriously?” Michael laughed, wiping his eyes hastily, “You’re pulling the it’s not you it’s me on me?”
Destiny shrugged, “It’s true, it’s my fault I’m a freak, not yours.”
“But you’re not a freak.” I mumbled.
