Are You Sirius? (A Marauders Fan Fiction)

Chapter Ten - "Acting like a squirrel on ecstasy."

10 – “Acting like a squirrel on ecstasy.”

“I think Lily is stressed,” James announced to Peter as the two of them sat outside Honeydukes on the road.

“Why?” Peter asked as he shoved a handful of Cockroach Clusters down his throat.

“Well, with being Head Girl and Taz being up the duff and living in her room she has very little time to spend with me. Obviously she’ll have withdrawal symptoms, like stress, for not having enough of my super-hot-amazingness around.”

“You’re so smart James!” Peter awed.

“I know. I wonder what I can do to make her less stressed so we can have more sexy time.” James wondered.

“You could take on more responsibility as Head Boy!”

“That’s an almost smart response Peter! But how?”

                Suddenly a wild first year appeared. The young boy looked as if he had been crying when he came over to the two seventh years.

“Excuse me, you’re Head Boy right?”

“Yes I am!” James smiled, “and I’m very busy thinking about how to be a better Head Boy, SO PISS OFF YOU MIDGET!” he roared at the frightened first year.

“But you – you said that if we ever had a problem we just had to ask you for help!” the first year whimpered.

“I TOLD YOU I’M – wait! I talked to the first years?” James had stood up by now and was standing a good foot taller than the small boy.

“Y – Yes sir, on the first day.”

“OH, I must have been drunk as a hunk of a skunk!” James smiled before throwing an arm around the boy. “If I help you, does that make me a good Head Boy?”

“Yes sir.” The boy nodded.

“Well in that case, what’s up your ass?” James grinned widely as he thought of all the rewards he would get from Lily for helping poor little … ah shite what was the buggers name again?

                James looked down at the kid to see he had finished talking. He blinked a few times before opening his mouth. “Sorry mate wasn’t listening, what were you saying?” the first year sighed in annoyance but repeated anyway.

“I said-”

“Hey Wormtail, is that Fluffy and Moony?” James screamed in the first years ear before pushing him to the ground and pointing a dancing Tasmin and sprinting Remus out to Peter.

“Is Tasmin dancing … with a coat on her head?” Peter asked slowly, his eyes fixed on the coat that was dangerously close to going flying.

“Why yes, I believe it is,” James chuckled, “WE SHALL APROACH THEM!” he yelled, standing on the poor first year in the process as he went running over to Tasmin and Remus, Peter close behind.

*

Sirius was standing outside Zonkos Joke Shop with a bag of dung bombs in hand when he saw Tasmin dancing down the street with Remus and James running after her and Peter huffing and puffing far behind them.

“WORMTAIL!” Sirius shouted causing the fat boy to fall over in shock. “What in the name of Merlin’s left testicle is going on?”

“Ta … Tasmin … Mo … Mo … Moony …-” Peter panted before being (rudely) interrupted by Sirius.

“Ah fudge it. I could do with the exercise!” He announced before taking off at a hard run and leaving Peter to trail behind him, wheezing.

*

Lily and Cory were outside the post office after sending letters to their families when Tasmin danced past. They stared after her for a moment before Tasmin stopped abruptly at the top of the street and came skipping back to them.

                She rugby tackled Cory to the ground and began to sob hysterically. Lily and Cory were shocked into motionlessness and it was in that position that the Marauders found them.

“I’m sorry I called you a whore! You’re just friendly!” She blubbered.

“Um …it’s okay?” Cory replied.

“YAY! Let’s go have a Slytherin versus Gryffindor cage fight!” Tasmin squealed.

“Best idea EVER!” Sirius and James coursed as they high-fived.

“That’s it, we’re going to Dumbledore!” Lily interjected gaining moans from the two boys.

“YAY! Oh, I wanna touch the Magical Ones beard!”

*****

“And here we are.” Remus finished.

“So no-one knows why Tasmin is acting like a squirrel on ecstasy?” James commented.

“Oh that’s easy,” Tasmin interjected, “I saw Regulus, he gave me some Fire Whiskey and that plus the morning sickness potion equals squirrel on ecstasy behaviour.”

“And you didn’t tell us this earlier because?” McGonagall asked in annoyance.

“I was busy hugging a tree.”

“What I would like to know,” Dumbledore started, “is why you had to take morning sickness potion.”

“Whoops, did we forget to tell you, funny story, Tasmins pregnant. Ta-da.” Lily laughed nervously.

I'm back :) Hope you enjoyed and yes I know it's short but come tomorrow I will be FREE, FREE I tell you FREE. So I can upload and write more regulaly cause aparantly I have no life, well, apart from work, friends, family ...

Story reccomendations have been added up to chapter six if you want to check them out. Thanks for reading! TO THE BATMOBILE NIKKI!