False smiles turn real chapter 1. new friends

Chapter 18. Arranging my feelings

When I woke up Saturday morning, I knew today would be great. First reason I knew this was because I still felt a little fluttery when Sam had kissed me and it had been about fifteen hours since that had happened, for some reason I had butterflies knowing he was coming round later, oh and the second reason was the sun was shining and it was the brightest April in more than twenty years according to the news. For once I didn't have to scrape myself off of my bed, instead I bounced out of it and down the stairs to where my mum was with my sister.

"Morning mum." I sang to her. Mum looked at me suspicious.

 "And why are you in such a good mood?" she asked.

 I was in no way going to tell mum what had happened yesterday especially not in front of my sister anyway so instead I just said.

"I am excited for my sleepover." by the looks of her face I wasn't the only one. Mum looked like she could burst of excitement at any second. I danced around the kitchen preparing my breakfast while my sister, Sophie sat at the table texting. I joined her with my buttered toast and steamy tea.

“Who are you texting?” I asked. I didn’t really care too much, Sophie was always texting someone.

“No one you know.” She said. Sophie really wasn’t the friendliest person in the world. She then looked up at me unattaching herself from her phone and said.

 “I saw you on Thursday.” At first I didn’t understand what she was talking about, then it hit me and I blushed brighter than ever before.

“What did you see?” I asked her suspiciously even though I of course knew. “I saw you and Sam kissing.” She said back.

“Now I want details.” I expected this from Sophie has she wanted nothing more than gossip to spread around to her friends and especially mum.

 “Did you tell mum?” I asked. She shook her head. “Sometimes I don’t like you but I am not that evil, I know what mum would be like because she has been like it before with me.” I sighed in relief looking around me to see if mum had come back in the room. She hadn’t so Sophie carried on. “So are you two going to get together?” she asked. Since the night we kissed I have been unusually happy. I didn’t really understand what this meant. I think I had protected my feelings since Adam had left. But I didn’t really understand all of this love stuff, Love was a little bit of a strong word to use for one kiss. Sophie would understand all of this but would I want her to butt in? I should take the chance. “I don’t know.” I said. I realised I sounded disappointed and Sophie picked it up too because she was grinning at me. “Oh my god you like him?” she gushed. I just nodded and blushed. I suppose now it was out it sounded more real. I really did like Sam. Sam was the one for me. Adam was just a little company over the summer but Sam had been my best friend for many years. He had been here when I was crying and with me to celebrate any good news I had. It was never Adam. “Are you going to tell him tonight?” Sophie asked. I looked over at the clock in the kitchen, it was half past ten. No one would be coming till about five at the earliest. I needed to rearrange my thoughts and feelings before I let them out.

"I don't know." I admitted. I really didn't know. Now I know why mum stays on her own. Love is so complicated. Sophie just nodded. Did she really understand how I felt about all of this? Just then mum came into the kitchen wiping her forehead. "It is so warm outside." she said. I looked outside and saw that there wasn't a cloud in sight

She looked at Sophie and at me and must have read through us since she asked "what is going on?" I opened my mouth to talk but Sophie beat me to it. "Amy loves Sam." she just blurted it out then excused herself like she hadn't even spoken leaving me alone with mum. "Is that true?" mum looked like an excited puppy. I would get Sophie for this later. "I don't know mum." I said. Mum sat down next to me her forehead creased. "What do you mean you don't know?" she asked. I wouldn't get out of this with mum. “We kissed three nights ago and since then I don’t know.” I said. Mum stood up quickly knocking her chair over and bounced around. “You have to tell him.” She pestered me for the next hour and every time I said no. What if he had given up caring now and had moved on? I couldn’t take being hurt twice.