Merlin felt his body heavily plunge to the ground off his horse. He clutched his body the pain of swords slashing him open rang wildly through him. He knew he'd never be able to get up onto his horse again and he felt like a failure however he was thankful the flower was on its way to Camelot with Gwaine.
He couldn't speak to call for the great dragon, invisible swords were impaling themselves into his throat, digging around inside of him. Tears ran down Merlin's face: he didn't care about dying, it was just the pure agony he was feeling and the fact he's never been able to say goodbye to Arthur.
Sometimes Arthur seemed more than a friend, sometimes Merlin loved him more than a friend, but Merlin knew they could never be and Merlin felt the guilt for Freya burning up his heart. It was complicated. Like everything else. He was complicated, piles of secrets stacked on his shoulders eating him down.
There was magic: the neverending reminder he was different, and Arthur would never like him for he was. And then his love for Arthur, the complex feelings he experienced sometimes driving him insane. Also, there was his destiny: being constantly told he's this amazing powerful person, the responsibility he was forced to maintain. There was much more as well, like Freya and the great dragon that all tied together with magic. Arthur would never know any of it anymore.
Merlin stared at the lightly painted sky, splashes of pink and orange seeping through the blueness. The stars were not yet visable, Merlin longed to count them all and understand the universe before he died. It was funny, he longed for death but there was still so much he wanted to do and realising he was dying not of his own will angered him.
Pain sliced through him once more, cutting of his train of thoughts like scissors and string. He wanted to scream but his lungs still burned as his throat let invisible blood drown him. He closed his eyes which had begun to bring with tears again.
So many secrets were going to die with him: wash away forgotten along with himself.
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As Clear As Blood (A Merlin Fan Fiction)
FanfictionCOMPLETE 'It was icy, and the water pulled him under and soaked him in coldness so his body went numb, Merlin continued swimming down the lake until he realised he could no longer see, no longer feel, no longer hear. No longer breathe.' On a huntin...
