Offstage || MJ

Offstage || Chapter 9

1987 – "Soul Train" (California)

CHARLENE

Shortly following New Year's, I returned to work. Mom and I remained close throughout the break and welcomed another period of the decade. Of course, Dad wouldn't even show up for Christmas dinner. Still, Mom and I didn't fret. This was just another year without my father. Sadly, there was nothing unusual. If Dad never wanted to partake in my life anymore, I couldn't force him to do anything.

Even after flying back to California, I still didn't call Michael. I only took the personal phone number to make this man shut up. There was no reasonable point in dialing due to his arrogance during the "Bad" short film rehearsals. As I've said, Jeffery and I fell out because of Jackson. Fame or not, I would never tolerate harassment on any ends.

Meanwhile, Prince and I kept in touch. He would release a brand-new album by March. I heard through grapevines that some album credits might Wendy and Lisa, which surprised me since "The Revolution" broke up for good last year. If true, I understood why. That duo obtained more talent than even I could imagine. Hopefully, I'd see Prince before he'd leave, embarking on another brilliant tour.

Right now, I stood in my usual spot among the cameras. At the start of this Soul Train line, chosen dancer Rosie Perez pumped her body to "So Emotional" by Whitney Houston. I sang the lyrics to myself while nodding along. As for Whitney, I first met this vividly gifted woman at the Grammy Awards last year. Such an adorable and humble person. Of course, my picture hang on one of many walls for my office in the set's building.

Near the end of "So Emotional," two men performed my choreography. Both individuals sported identical black and red outfits. Even though the pair couldn't view me right now, I stuck out my tongue in a joking manner while observing. The word joy couldn't even begin to label my state of mind. I'd worked on routines time and time again, but every occasion still felt brand-new and delightful.

On the other hand, Michael would release his album in late August. Of course, this LP was still named "Bad." Regardless of my personal feelings toward Michael, I'd still buy the record. There was no doubt in my mind that this album would be remarkable. Given the stellar musical quality of "Off The Wall" and "Thriller," I expected nothing short of greatness. Since Michael upheld this reputation as a perfectionist, I knew he shared my sentiment.

I bumped fists with Rosie before leaving that day. I'd even suggested the idea of mentoring her myself. Her talent and moves intrigued me quite a bit. Don Cornelius refused my idea. I soon moved on and chose to remain grateful. As I've said, Don could've easily rejected my initial negotiation to choreograph for the show last year. I'd wanted to dance as a member of the "Soul Train Gang" of course, but a capacity issue hindered me more than anything else.

Just when I headed to the exit doors backstage, my eyes noticed another stagehand rushing toward me. I squinted toward her, but following the footsteps back to my office nearby. While her boots moved along the floor, we never exchanged words. This woman unlocked the door with one of many keys and stepped back to let me walk inside.

I dropped my tote bag onto this carpet for the millionth time after shutting that wooden door behind me. My eyes widened seconds later. A red and heart shaped box perched on my desk. This golden bow wrapped around the same item. If only a Polaroid camera rested in my palms. I'd take any picture before unraveling such a cliché but lovely gift.

From the corner of my eyes, an envelope rested near the box. With almost careful steps, I walked around my desk to sit down and reached over, opening the envelope first. I didn't know what to think, but still kept an open mind. Anyone could've surprised me at work now.

Charlene,

Happy New Year! I don't usually celebrate major holidays, but I hope you enjoyed the festive season last year. There's nothing wrong with happiness. Anyway, I've missed you. Honestly. Things have been so crazy lately that I haven't seen you in person since visiting Soul Train. There's no rush in terms of calling me, either. I know exactly how it feels to lose track of time. Our careers force us to anticipate nothing less. I really hope that you enjoy the chocolate. It's not much, but I just wanted to make you smile.

Call me whenever. I'll be waiting.

-Mike.

I still appreciated the new gesture, but Michael would never comprehend the depth of my refusals. These gifts wouldn't change my mind no matter what. As I've said, his previous egotism turned me off so much. I just wanted someone to understand me as a person. 

I didn't want a man to swoon over me as if I were some angel. At the same, I still didn't want a man to betray me like Dad. One minute, my parents were absolutely in love with each other, and the next, Dad left the family after several years with Mom. As I've said, I refused to be naïve and stupid like that. Mom had clearly learned her own lessons concerning relationships.

Beyond friendships and hookups, I still closed my heart.