2p! Hetalia Headcanons

Human AU Jobs Headcanons

Axis

2p Italy:
- Mafia Boss
- This shouldn't be a surprise
- Ruthless leader
- He's a family man though if you really think about it
- He enjoys watching people suffer under his hand if they deserved it
- Coffee is a must for him to start his Mafia mornings off right
- There will be hell for anyone who uses the last of his coffee and didn't buy more
- He knows that it's never him who does it because he always buys more the day he runs out first thing after he finishes his cup
- He takes pinky promises seriously even though they originated in Japan
- He will cup your pinky off if you break the pinky promise
- He usually doesn't get his hands dirty himself
- He's got henchmen for that, but he'll do the pinky promise stuff himself
- Always makes sure his men are safe and well equipped to do their jobs
- Can't stand it when someone screws up deals he makes with other organizations

2p Romano:
- Fashion Designer
- This shouldn't be a surprise either
- He's a household name
- But he's also a huge name in the fashion industry
- Always invited to fashion shows even if his designs aren't in them
- His designs are annually shown during Fashion Week in New York City
- Loves to have all the attention on his models, his designs, and himself
- He will be very passive aggressive towards anyone who gives him unjust negative criticism
- You need an acceptable reason behind disliking his designs
- Saying you just don't like them isn't at all an acceptable reason to him
- He loves it when people ask ask him for autographs
- Always tries to think outside the box with his designs

2p Germany:
- Preschool Teacher
- He's great with kids despite his rough appearance
- Loves to help the younger generations learn new things
- He uses a lot of fun little projects to teach them
- He sometimes will use worksheets though if it's something like the alphabet or numbers so they can learn to write them
- He plays little games with them whenever they ask him to
- The kids love him to death
- So do the moms
- Mainly the single ones
- He's sort of strict with them if they do something unexceptional
- He gets a little lenient sometimes if they get really upset about getting in trouble
- Time outs are a rare occurrence because of this
- It also helps that the children he teaches are absolute angels
- Story time is a must
- Tries to do different voices for each character to make it more fun
- The kids LOVE this

2p Prussia:
- Book Store Owner
- He's quiet
- So is his store
- It's kind of set up like a Barnes & Noble and a library but without the Starbucks in it
- He offers free Wi-Fi
- He gets a lot of students that drop by to talk to him or do their homework in peace
- He's very resourceful if you need books for a research paper
- He spends a lot of time reorganizing bookshelves that careless people messed up after hours
- Thankfully this doesn't happen often
- Holds monthly contests that either involve riddles he came up with, guessing jars, or other things along those lines to win a free book or two or the winner's choosing
- He also holds book clubs
- This thing has a little over twenty members now, and he is so happy about it

2p Japan:
- Successful Manga Artist
- Yes, it's Hentai
- Not all of it is though
- He does manga signings every few months at book stores
- He attends manga conventions whenever his schedule permits it
- He likes meeting his fans
- The calm ones though
- He hates it when the over zealous fans bombard him with questions
- Gives secret shoutouts to fans he likes and his editors within his mangas
- He'd love to have his manga turned into an anime
- But he doesn't want anything important left out when it's animated, so he hasn't agreed to make any deals with animation companies

Allies

2p America:
- Therapist
- He's got problems too, so he can relate to some people well
- Mainly the people who have anxiety because he has it himself
- He's quiet when his clients are talking to him
- Decent at giving advice
- Fantastic at comforting
- Tries to crack jokes to lighten the mood when things start to feel too dark
- He has a wall in his office full of inspirational quotes left from previous clients who he helped
- Anyone is allowed to add to it whenever they want
- He also has a bunch of stress or anxiety relief toys in his office for people to toy with during their therapy sessions

2p Canada:
- Mountie
- The uniform makes the man
- He named his horse Butterscotch on account of the color of her mane
- Don't you dare think about sneaking into Canada
- He will find you, and he will fine you
- Or hold you at a Mountie station, whichever comes first
- He's the most intimidating out of the members of the force
- He is relentless with enforcing the law
- He made friends with a moose one day while out on patrol
- No one knows how it happened
- Everyone knows how he met Kuma though
- He helped the poor polar bear when he was injured as a cub

2p Russia:
- Lawyer
- He takes his job very seriously
- He's only ever lost three cases in the course of his career
- He often stays up late to make sure he's thorough with what questions he wants to ask the witnesses and when evidence he and his client have
- It's mainly due to his insomnia
- It's his job to defend his clients, but if he knows for sure that they are in the wrong, he tries a little less than he should to make sure justice is served
- He aspires to become a judge one day
- He once defended himself on a case of breaking and entering when he was trying to escape his older sister
- He won the case

2p England:
- Bakery Owner
- He has it decorated in pretty pastel colors
- He has bakery specials that you have to ask for because they aren't listed on his menu or in the display cabinets
- Memorized all of his regular customers' orders
- He has pretty much a bakery item for everyone
- Vegan? He's got vegan cookies and cakes
- Allergic to gluten? He's got gluten-free items
- He's been asked if he uses box mixes before
- Nearly cried right in front of the person who asked, but kept it together until he got home
- His shop may be little, but it attracts a lot of customers

2p France:
- Winery Owner
- He makes every type of wine imaginable
- He makes a lot of money, especially around the holidays
- He gets complaints about his wine sometimes
- He handles it like a pro
- Actually is really petty about it and sends a complaint about the complainer to the person who complained
- His workers think it's funny
- Holds wine tastings every other weekend at his vineyard
- Luciano and Flavio attend once a month because François let's them have free wine for their patronage
- He sells wine advent calendars in December for those who want to sample his wine
- He mainly just wants to make more money

2p China:
- Pharmacist
- He knows everything about drugs
- Memorized all the formulas for the medicine he has to mix
- He has to take prescription drugs for ADHD
- Lost his previous job for substance abuse, but cleaned up his act and checked into a rehab center willingly
- Decided to put all that knowledge of drugs to use and went to medical school for pharmaceutical science
- He makes so much money that he donates $1,000-$3,000 a month to different charities
- He almost always donates an extra $1,000 to drug abuse prevention groups