In Two Minds

Brotherly Advice

"Hey, Rachel can I see Joseph?" Quinn stood awkwardly on the doorstep of the home her brother shared with his wife and their two children, it was the perfect family home the front and back garden finished off with a white picket fence. 

The woman frowned at her, her arms crossed defiantly over her chest like she was on guard, meetings with her brother's wife always went this icily, it was a ridiculous thing really Quinn had never forced the woman to have sex with her, yet Rachel still resented her. 

Why can't my love life ever be normal?

"How long will you be here this time Quinn?" The other woman scowled at her, brown eyes burning through her, hate pouring from every pore on her body. 

"I don't know I just need to see Joe." 

"Try to be quick I don't want you in my home for a long time." Disdain flowed from her mouth, Quinn rolled her eyes at the woman. "Maybe try to be a better hostess next time Rachel, you are about as cold as the ice caps, only you're not in danger of thawing anytime soon." 

"Get a move on." 

After their one and only night together  Quinn had found Rachel expected way more than just a one night stand, and with the reappearance of Sara, she was going through her full-blown crush mode. 

Quinn was certain she had never forgiven her for rejecting her, but when faced with choosing anyone over Sara Lance it was quite simply impossible, Sara held precedence over anyone and everyone in Quinn's mind. 

"Listen Rach I just came from hell literally I need to see my brother now." Sighing the other woman stepped aside and let her past, making sure to stay as far away from her as possible. At least I got rid of those bastard leathers. 

"Where are the children?" Quinn's heartfelt slightly battered not seeing any sign of young life around the house, she had wanted to see them remind her that she was a part of the human race with feelings and not just a cog in a machine. 

"It's Christmas Quinn they are out with friends." Rachel snapped uncaring if her sister-in-law looked sad, her eyes were drawn and looked like at some point she had been crying. 

"Oh okay, I am sorry I won't see them." 

"I'm sure you will get over it, Joe is outside don't keep him too long he has to pick the girls up in an hour" 

With that she walked away further into the house, the house she knew she really wasn't welcome in and yet in this moment felt a compelling need to be. 

                                                                                xxxx

Tears welled in her eyes as she stood by the door and watched her brother, his blonde hair flying around his face as he moved one bit of wood and then another, then another, on Earth X she had to learn of his execution. Here he lived and breathed. 

Seeing his name on a list of the exterminated had been a hard pill to take. 

"Hey Joe." Sighing she braced herself and called out to her brother, lifting his head a bright smile appeared on his face when he saw it was her. 

"Quinn!" Dropping the plank of wood he had in his hands he stepped over the discarded pieces of wood and headed towards his little sister. 

Joseph wasted no time throwing his arms around her and holding her tight, his glasses falling slightly off his face as he buried his face into her hair, assuring himself that she was actually there with him, whenever she was away doing her job he always feared she would be hurt, with no one looking after her this was his constant worry. 

"When did you get back?" Quinn watched his hands move in front of him, they moved fast shaking slightly, she smiled. He is happy to see me. 

"Just yesterday." 

"And you are only coming around now? Are you staying for Christmas?" He looked hopeful like a child being told he was getting a puppy. 

"I needed some time alone to think things through, things happened on Earth X that has changed a lot of stuff," She sighed thinking of Sara. "And no I won't be staying."

"Do you have somewhere to be?" His eyes cast a sad shadow. 

"No, I'll just do the same as always, hide out somewhere and ride out the holidays." 

"You should be with your family Quinn, please stay here with us." 

Quinn laughed sarcastically. "Rachel will love that." 

"Don't worry just have a good time being a Dad, I need to talk about something with you." How could she say what she was about to say?

"Okay, what is it?" He asked cautiously. 

"On Earth X I saw Sara she isn't dead Joe, my Sara is alive well she isn't my Sara anymore but you know what I mean." 

Something in his eye caught her attention, he was avoiding eye contact with her. 

"Do you know something?" She narrowed her eyes and gazed at him. 

"I knew she wasn't dead or  that she was resurrected is more accurate." 

Anger blazed in Quinn's eyes. "You knew and you didn't tell me?" 

"No I thought it was for the best, let you get over her she always causes trouble for you and I don't want to see that happen again."

"Thank you for giving me the choice Joe, damn you, Joseph, I was haunted by a fucking ghost that wasn't even a ghost!" Her face was turning red with rage. "Do you know how guilty I felt? Try sleeping at night when you feel so guilty that it eats away at you until it's a constant pain."

"I'm sorry Quinn, I thought I was doing the right thing." He sighed. "What will you do now? Did you reconnect?"

Quinn smiled at her brother's choice of words. I wish. 

"No, I left without seeing her, besides I overheard a conversion it sounded like she was with someone, so it would do no good for anyone, just get my heart broken again."

"I'm sorry Quinn." Her brother signed, she smiled at him. "I know it's okay what is done is done."

"I want you to find someone Quinn, you deserve to be loved."

Waving her hand at him in a dismissive gesture she laughed a bitter laugh. "Love is overrated Joe, it never lasts."

How she wished that was true, her love had started when she was very young and still she was plagued by it, obsessed with one figure she saw as perfection and no one ever came near her.