BTS Imagines 3 (Complete)

Jin

Warning: If you are not comfortable with stories including suicidal behavior, I advise you not to read this and patiently wait for the next part.
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Just staring at my own reflection makes me want to curl up into a little ball and forget about the world. Who will care anyways? My friends have their friends and I have no one.

I do what I usually do in the mornings: put my hair up in a bun and wash my face. I've stopped wearing make up because who even notices me? No one. Without even looking, I grabbed my clothes and put them on. I don't really have the energy to actually care what I wear.

On my way to work, I listen to music. That's the only thing that brings me to peace. I can run off to my own world and mute out the people who don't matter to me.

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"I bet I can do a flip without stumbling", Jimin said to Jungkook.

"I bet you'll fall right on your a-"

"Ahh, language. We don't want our (y/n) being corrupted by your childishness. Right, (y/n)?", Jin asked as he turned towards me.

I shrugged my shoulders as I was sitting down on the floor. My eyes were focused on my laptop, checking out the reviews from their latest interview. Most questions were about me, which didn't really make me happy.

"Right because (y/n) is stupid enough to follow what we do. She's not like that", Jungkook said, chuckling as he shook his head.

"But I do remember she fell on her face as she tried to jump off the stairs. She couldn't do it but because Hoseok hyung tried it and succeeded, she thought she could do it too", Jimin said, laughing as he clapped his hands.

I really thought I could do it. I don't know why he's laughing. It really hurt. I had to get surgery on my nose because it was too damaged. Then their fans went after me because they thought I was fake. Getting surgery wasn't my choice but I guess my decision to jump off the stairs really makes it my fault.

"(Y/n), do you wanna get lunch later?", Jin asked, kneeling down in front of me.

"I don't feel like it. I had a really huge breakfast this morning. Plus, I don't have the appetite to eat", I said, avoiding eye contact with him.

While the rest of the guys were busy fooling around, Jin glanced at them and sat down next to me.

"Are you okay?", he asked, sounding more concerned.

"Yeah I'm fine. I'm just trying to figure out what you guys should wear for your next interview", I said.

"No. I meant are you okay? You've been distant these lattes months. You don't even smile anymore. And I know what you do", Jin said.

"I don't know what you're talking about", I said, continuing to look at my laptop.

Jin stared at me for a few seconds before reaching out for my wrist. I lightly hissed and pulled my arm back. At first he looked very angry but wrapped an arm around me to pull me close.

"What's going on?", he asked.

"N-Nothing. I have to go. I forgot I need to organize some papers at the office", I quickly stood up and put my laptop away, sprinting out of the practice room after getting my things.

Instead of heading towards the office, I ran straight into the bathroom and tried to even put my breathing. I heard the bathroom door open so I went into a stall and locked the door. Two girls walked in to retouch their make-up.

"I don't understand why they have her as their stylist. She can't even dress herself", one girl said.

"I know right. She dresses as if she was blind. I applied to that job a few weeks ago and they didn't give it to me. Just because they're friends doesn't mean that they can take the advantage to give her a job that she's not compatible for. If I were their stylist, I bet they'd be getting a bunch of interviews. She's useless", the other one said.

I tried not to make a single sound as the tears began to stream down from my eyes. As soon as the girls left the bathroom, I grabbed my stuff and ran out, not caring about the people who saw me as I cried.

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When I arrived at the house, I paced back and forth in my room. The tears wouldn't stop and the pain only got worse. I couldn't take it anymore. I called my brother because I knew he wouldn't answer right away. I left a voicemail and turned off my phone.

I kept pacing and pacing, feeling the pain every minute, reminding myself that no one cares about me. A few minutes later, my phone began to ring. I didn't answer, I just threw my phone across the room.

I walked into the bathroom and looked for whatever pills I could find. With shaky hands, I opened the small orange container and poured a few pills on my hand.

A moment later, I was sitting on the bathroom floor, feeling my body become numb. I stopped crying because what was the point? That wasn't gonna make anything better. I was becoming sleepy but I could hear a voice calling out for me.

"(Y/n)?? What have you done??"

Jin. He came here to check on me. It's too late now.

He noticed the empty orange container that was on the floor. He began to panic and carried my body into the shower. He turned on the water and tried to wake me up. After realizing that wasn't working, he stuck two fingers into my mouth until I threw up whatever I swallowed.

"Jin? What are you doing?? Leave me alone!", I yelled as I tried to get away from his grip but that only caused him to tighten the hug.

"No. I'm not leaving you alone. You don't deserve this. You're so much better than this. I should've known something was going on with you and I'm sorry for not realizing that. I care about you and wouldn't know what to do if you did something like this. Please, there are people who love you", he whispered into my ear.

I was tired of fighting so I stayed there in his arms. Once I was calm, he helped me out of my wet clothes and handed me dry ones. The rest of the day, he made sure I wasn't alone and he can tried to convince me to seek help. Even though I thought it was a bad idea, I agreed to get help so I could get back on my feet.
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Just trying to spread awareness. Suicide or self harm is never the answer! All of you are beautiful in every way, talented in every way, and special in every way. Never try to fight fire with fire because you will eventually end up hurt. If you think people don't care about you or love you, you are wrong. I don't know any of you personally but I love you all so much and care about you and your well-being. Everyone deserves to live a happy life. I will remind you every day, if not, every time I post that you guys matter to me.

Sending lots of love from me to all of you❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️