I do.

Can't explain it

When the couple arrived at the party, everyone was dancing and having a good time. Most were gathered outside by Samira's pool where a bartender was serving some drinks and music was blaring. The two met up with their usual friends but a certain blonde was missing.
"Where's Taylor?" Yael asked. Laura sighed and nodded her head toward the sliding glass door into the house. Sure enough that's where Taylor sat, alone on the couch with a wine glass.
"She okay?" Natasha looked over at her friend, worried.
"I don't know, she won't tell anyone what's wrong." The black haired woman sighed. With a bit of coaxing, they convinced Laura to try again, and while they didn't hear what was said, Taylor wouldn't even make eye contact with Laura. A few moments into the conversation, Taylor stood up and they hugged, the blonde exiting the house right after. Of course when Laura returned to the group, she told them what had happened. "She's just having a rough day, I wasn't about to pressure her into telling me everything but I'll talk to her about it tomorrow. Uzo sent Taylor a text telling her she loves her and she can always talk to her. The party went on as normal, but every now and then the group could sense an empty space only Taylor could fill.

The flight to Australia was a long one, but the two managed to make it fun. They told stories of their childhoods, and reminisced about their feelings before they'd gotten together.
"So it was love at first sight then?" Yael teased, putting a hand under her chin, staring dreamily at the blonde next to her.
"I didn't believe in it, not until I saw you." She replied, kissing Yael on the nose.
"You know, I always felt there was something more to us. Friends don't cuddle as much as we did, or kiss eachother on the face, at least not that much. When we danced that night.." The brunette paused, a large smile forming on her face. "I felt so special, like there was no one else in the world. I wouldn't have wanted to be anywhere else." Natasha held her girlfriend's hand, smiling back at her. "Also, you know that scene we had to do in season five where Lorna asks Nicky to fuck her?" Natasha raised an eyebrow. "I purposefully messed that take up twice so I could kiss you again."
"I definitely believe that. I love you." Natasha kissed Yael's hand.
"I love you too." Yael snuggled close to Natasha, their hands intertwined.

They walked cautiously to the front door of Yael's childhood home, both secretly panicking inside. Yael reached her hand out to knock but paused for a moment out of fear. Natasha gently lowered Yael's hand and took it in her own, using her free one to knock herself. Elana was the one to answer the door, and she didn't hesitate to throw her arms around her sister.
"I missed you so much." Elana clung onto Yael for dear life and it was actually very endearing. Natasha smiled and timidly spoke.
"Hey Elana, nice to finally meet you." The other brunette widened her eyes in surprise breaking away from the hug.
"Oh! Hi Natasha! It's so good to meet you too, you're even more pretty in person. My sister's told me loads about you." She winked, making Natasha giggle.
"Has she?" She smirked at Yael who punched her sister playfully in the arm. Elana invited the two in and their brother appeared, smiling almost as widely as Elana when he hugged Yael. The love the three siblings shared for one another was something Natasha only dreamed of with her brother. She hadn't seen him in years, and she doubted he even cared where she was. Her mother wasn't very interested in her life either, when she was homeless and on the street she never received any help from either of them. But this relationship the three siblings had, it was perfect, almost too much so. Natasha had just shaken hands with Jake when Yael's father Harry walked in. He greeted his daughter with open arms then turned to the blonde.
"Welcome Natasha, we are so very happy to have you in our home." He opened his arms as if asking for a hug, which Natasha shyly accepted. "My daughter has told me so much about you, you really are special to her."
"Dad!" Yael whined "Don't embarass me!" The others in the room laughed at the small brunette, Natasha kissing her on the cheek. The happy vibe however was interrupted when Judy, Yael's mother, appeared in front of them. The older woman eyed Natasha up and down, as if thouroughly examining her. There was an intense look in her eyes, and Natasha felt as if she would die at any moment.
"I wasn't aware that the person who ruined this family would be joining us." Judy scoffed, glaring.
"Honey, please." Harry put a hand on his wife's shoulder. Jake and Elana gave their mother an angry look, protectively shielding their sister. "The rest of us happen to like her so can you put aside your differences for just a few hours?"
"Yael, kitchen. Now." Judy sighed and left the room, not taking her glare off of Natasha. As Yael was walking away, Jake grabbed her hand and gave her a worried look.
"I'll be fine." Yael nodded at her brother and disappeared out the doorway. Immediately when she was gone Harry turned to Natasha.
"I'm so sorry, please try your best to ignore her, she just needs time to accept this." Natasha nodded, actually kind of hurt from Judy's words. Elana saw the sorrow in her eyes and took her hand apologetically.
"Jake and I will help if she gets out of line again, I know Yael is just as upset as you are. But Natasha, we think you're really good for our sister." She gave a warm smile, which Jake followed suit. Harry nodded and excused himself, leaving Natasha with Yael's older siblings. The awkward atmosphere was interrupted when Natasha's phone buzzed and she took it out, seeing she received a text from Ruby. Ruby Rose was a past fellow castmate, Australian just like Yael. She clearly knew the two would be in the area as the text read:

Hey Lyonne! Heard you and the tiny Aussie would be around. Maybe we can meet up while you're here? Miss you two!! -xoxo Ruby

Natasha smiled and replied they'd set up details later as Elana invited Natasha to sit on the couch with her. Jake sat in an armchair on the other side of the room, pulling out his phone. Elana however felt like chatting.
"So, Natasha, this might be an odd question, but bare with me. I can't ask my sister this, so you'll have to do." She chuckled "But..are girls really that much better than guys? In bed I mean." She blushed but kept a straight face, looking right at the blonde who raised her eyebrows in surprise.
"Well, in my opinion yeah, they are. They just know what you'd like because well duh, they're girls too. Plus they're just softer, you know what I mean? There's so much more passion." Elana nodded, smiling faintly.
"No wonder my sister likes you, you seem so happy with her."
"I am. I really, really am." Natasha grinned "She's the best thing that's ever happened to me, I've never loved someone so much." Jake looked up from his phone to butt into the conversation.
"Cut the crap Elana, we have to talk to her about it sooner or later you know." Natasha's eyes darted toward the curly haired man, shocked at his remark.
"Can't I be nice? Is that such a bad thing Jake?" He sighed.
"No, I'm sorry. But we have to make sure this doesn't end in hell like it always has." Elana nodded and looked into Natasha's eyes.
"We know our sister can be very distant sometimes, but it's only because she's trying to compose herself so she doesn't mess up. If she acts that way just, let her be. She thinks she's going to screw up and she gets scared. Please don't pressure her on it either, because she freaks out more. Yael really, really loves you, like more than we've ever seen her love another human being. Just, show her she's worth it, because we all know she is." There was a pause, and before Natasha could answer there was a bark coming from upstairs. "Gracie! Shush!!" Elana yelled "Damn dog. We're keeping her up there for dinner." Natasha nodded and swallowed nervously, she didn't know what to say. She knew Yael had days like that, but now knowing why kind of pained her. She never wanted Yael to feel like she was going to mess up.
"I promise I'll do my best. I never want to lose her, she's perfect and she's everything I've ever wanted." The Stone siblings smiled, hugging their future sister in-law. The hug was broken by a ear piercing yell from presumably the dining room.
"DINNER IS READY! GET IT WHILE IT'S HOT!!!" Judy's shrill voice rang through the walls, causing the three to cringe. They entered the dining room to find Yael and her father seated across from eachother, and Natasha timidly took a seat next to her girlfriend, her sister sitting on the other side. Judy sat across from Natasha next to her husband, and Jake positioned himself across from Elana. Dinner went normally at first, the family exchanging small talk while the couple held hands under the table as they ate. Yael's mother however picked up on it and scolded them. "This is a family dinner table not a gay bar, enough." The two nervously let go of eachother and continued eating. Harry broke the new silence.
"So Natasha, how is it working with our daughter? Do your cast mates tease you?" He smiled playfully.
"Yeah they do. They act like kids actually, it's pretty adorable." The family laughed except Judy, who was eyeing Natasha very closely.

After dinner the Stone siblings and Natasha gathered in the living room, glasses of alcohol in hand. The four talked and laughed for awhile until they all headed to bed, where the couple was stopped by Yael's mother.
"Oh no, you are not corrupting my baby girl's bedroom. You stay in the guest room." Natasha sighed and obeyed, walking sadly to the other room. As she was climbing in bed she heard Yael and her mother arguing. She was a bit drunk, so falling asleep was easy despite the yelling. It was around three in the morning when Natasha heard her door creak open and the familiar short brunette walked in. She climbed into the bed with her girlfriend, who wrapped her arms around her.
"I'm so sorry about my mom..." Yael sniffled. Natasha frowned and kissed her softly, and even in the dark she could tell Yael had been crying.
"Hey, she won't break us up right? Nothin's gonna break us apart baby. I promise you." Yael nodded slightly and closed her eyes, Natasha following soon after. This was going to take some work, but Natasha promised herself she would get on civil terms with Judy before they went back to New York.

A/N
HEY GUYS! So sorry I took so long to update, the holidays have been super crazy and a ton has been happening in my life lately. Thanks for being so patient! Yes I'm aware that Samira isn't in the show anymore but I miss Poussey a lot so I decided to keep her around in this book. Thanks for reading and thank you so much for the support!
ALSO HAPPY NEW YEAR!