Kesalahan

3

*ting ting*

Aku menyambar telefon bimbitku yang berada di atas meja. Lampu biru berkelip kelip di bahagian flash menandakan bahawa ada mesej dari Wen. Mana aku tahu ? Haa aku set flash biru tu khas untuk Wen.

Weh bie, peiyan ajak aku jumpa kat taman dekat kawasan rumah aku

Hati aku terbakar apabila membaca mesej yang dihantar.

Kau jangan pergi. Aku tak bagi.

Aku memang taknak pergi. Dahla panas. Taman tu jauh.

Peiyan. Perempuan yang tak faham bahasa melayu, english mahupun cina. Habis tu nak cakap bahasa apa ?

Wen menghantar screenshot chat dia bersama Peiyan. Hatiku bagai dicarik-carik apabila membaca semua itu.

____________________

Peiyan Wen

Can I see you for a while ?

I have a girlfriend.
Walk out of my life now.
I'm sorry if I hurt you. I dont even care if you hate me now.

What do you mean ?
You said you won't leave
You won't go

I don't like you. Don't be silly I was playing around with you.

You don't ? Even once ?
At all ?

Of course no

You lied to me ?

Yea, I was playing around. That's all.

No. You was not playing. You are hurting, right ? You know it right, the feeling of being hurt, Chow Ching Wen ?
You got a girlfriend ? What the fucking hell stupid excuse you trying to give me ? You fikir I akan percaya ?
You tak suka I ? Yea bukan senang nak sayangkan orang sebelum kenal.

Aku game kau la, Auh Pei Yan. Tak boleh nampak ke ? Kau senang sangat kena tipu. I did this for fun.

Aku sayangkan kau, even aku sanggup breakup dengan orang lain demi kau. Aku menyesal. I'm scared of falling in love again.
You did this for fun ? I don't believe you.
I know you have something that burdens you. Stop it. I know you are strong but please stop saying that you are okay.
I know you are crying, I don't know why you have to lie to me. I hate it when you wanted me to give up.
It will hurts us.
You want me to let you go. Why must you lie ?
Chow Ching Wen, at least let me know the reason.

I need her. She is enough for me.
I never like you.

You can't put me down.

Why should I meet you ?
She is really my girlfriend

Who is  she ?

Ain

Oh. I did lots of things, you still can't love me. I give up.

____________________

Yea, aku rasa sakit. Sangat sakit walaupun Wen dah reject dia. Air mata aku mengalir perlahan. Dinding disebelah aku tumbuk sekuat hati. Tiga kali. Sakit ditangan tak sama dengan sakit dihatiku.

Tolong, jangan kacau dia. Aku dah bahagia.

Aku taknak lepaskan dia. Walau sekejap.

Auh Peiyan, once you get close to my girl, you won't feel your legs.

I swear.