The Book I'll Never Write

Chapter: THEY ARE FUCKING CHILDREN

I've noticed that girls aren't allowed to just enjoy things. Every choice we make is judged and used as a weapon against us. If we like dresses, makeup, "girly" things we get called superficial. If we like sweatpants, short hair, and sports we're not feminine enough. If we like Chick-Flicks we're cliche, if we don't we're not girly enough. If we wear short skirts and shorts we're sluts, but if we wear long dresses and pants we're prudish. No matter what we do we are always bashed and ridiculed. If I like Young Adult novels and Teen novels because they interest me, who are you to try to say I should be reading something 'Intelligent'? Why do I have to work so hard to be acceptable to the world? If we like certain music we get bashed, if we like certain movies we get bashed. And don't even get me started on the complete condescending way men talk down to us. Especially if a girl likes video games. Honestly girls are completely fetishized and over sexualized. I've been told my whole life that my body is distracting to boys. But here's the thing: It fucking isn't! Sure, in certain situations, I'm sure that I could portray my body in a way to garner attention, but wearing a tank top? Wearing shorts? And fuck, telling a 3rd grade girl that she was dressed too sexy? I was in a reasonable skirt, with tights, and a cute shirt. I was a fucking child. All my life, adult men have given attention to me. I was always the center of attention, and as a kid I enjoyed it. But as I grew older, I began to get increasingly more uncomfortable with it.

I wear clothes that aren't inherently sexual. Shorts, a tank top, and long socks. Usually I wear a jacket too. And I have had GROWN men comment on how "sexy" I looked. Do you realize how sickening that is? And if an ADULT man gets uncomfortable around a fucking 12 year old little girl wearing shorts and a tank top than he is the one with a problem for insinuating that a child is sexual. I shouldn't have to cover my skin for the benefit of an adult man. It is completely sickening to me. I shouldn't have to feel this way. It's unfair, it's degrading, it's sickening. School dress codes focus on not distracting the boys rather than looking professional and appropriate. And no offense, but I don't think my fucking hair being pink is gonna be all that distracting. Nor is my shoulder, or my thigh.