In A Relationship With Lay of Exo

s h i y i

ERRORS AHEAD

We can no longer do anything about those comments, right? Haha.

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I ORDERED another cup but this time it's chocolate sundae, not because I am that hungry but because I want to buy more time with Yixing, it's still early anyway. He, on the other hand, bought a coke in can.

"Is it alright to drink coke after eating ice cream?"

He gave me a half shrug, "I think so, cokefloats wouldn't exist if it's not. Do you want some cake?"

I immediately gestured 'no'. He's a student, we're both fifteen and I'm not yet his girlfriend so I don't think it's right for him to pay things for me. "I'll just finish this." I mumbled, pertaining to the cup of sundae in front of me.

Right at this moment, I want to touch my chest and whisper 'calm down' to my heart. It has been racing wildly since I saw him outside our room but how can I help it from doing so? Yixing looked like my boyfriend earlier and that's the only thing I want him to be so how can I not feel giddy about it? I took a deep breath, there's this thought inside my mind that wants to confess to him already although there's a bigger part in me that doesn't want to.

Because what if he doesn't take it seriously?

Or what if he doesn't want me?

I looked around, trying to ease the tension in me by rubbing my hands together on my lap while Yixing has his arms folded on the table. But what if he likes me too? Frustration had spread like wildfire within me, this is what I absolutely hate in our situation. The stress of not knowing anything in his part is so damn annoying, I mean why is it so hard to be a girl? We can't tell the person we want that we like them because girls shouldn't be doing the first move but here are the guys we want, not doing anything but send us all the mixed signals they can. And eventually break our hearts in the end because 'they don't feel the same way'.

And before I can even stop myself, I already blurted out the words, "What if I like you?"

Surprised, Yixing stared at me with his eyes wide. "Huh?"

I repeated what I just asked, "What if I like you?" Acting like it's not a big deal, I smiled at him when I saw how his reaction changed like he didn't like the idea. Is that a disgusted look on his face? My racing heart suddenly stepped fully on the brakes, it slowed down, painfully. "Hey," I tapped his shoulder to lighten up the atmosphere, "I was just asking, it doesn't mean that I do."

The rest of the afternoon was hell, awkward silence enveloped the both of us like we were two people forced into a blind date and ended up disappointed because we didn't like each other. I didn't bother speaking because the expression he just made earlier pains me until now, I'm afraid I'd end up crying in front of him.

"I'll walk you h—"

I moved away, "No," I faked a laugh even when my chest feels tight and one more minute with him will send me to hell and back, "I can take care of my own, thank you for today. Bye!" I gave him a dismissive wave and ran away, the moment I turned my back against him was the exact moment the tears fell from my eyes.

What's the sense of a pretty face if the guy I like doesn't even want me? Right, Xu Yan. It will be okay. Soon, it will be. The maids were throwing me curious looks when they saw me running inside with puffy eyes, I didn't glance at them and locked myself inside the room, burying my face on my pillow and cried myself to sleep.