It's not a phase, just depression

M

I could almost say I'm happy.
I could almost be happy for you,
But I'm still scared,
Still scared to break you.
I don't want to break you into little pieces,
little pieces of emptiness and sadness.
We're friends,
friends who share,
friends who share their happiness and sadness,
But what would happen if I want more?
I can't.
I shouldn't,
I shouldn't want more.
That's what the voices in my head keep telling me.
I'll listen to them for now,
just to spare you,
and spare your tears.

~06.01.2018