You, but not you - a EruRi Lovestory

11 - Nightmare

Slightly chuckling and a bit astonishes, that the male does as he wants, he gets into a more or less comfortable position to sleep with. He was tired, his mind and body was worn out from the long day. He looks to the side examining Levi's way too flawless face. His pale skin, the dark circles under his eyes, he clearly didn't had enough sleep, but the glint in his eyes stirred a strange feeling. Half jokingly he says:
    "Feeling uncomfortable? Should I roll onto you? Not that I can in my state." He chuckles, but at the same time an excitement rushes through his body at the thought of it, that bewildered him highly.
    'What in the world? Stop behaving like a teenage idiot.' He scolds himself and closes his eyes to find some sleep.
   " Try to sleep Levi. I doubt that anyone benefits from my death in the state I am in currently."

     Slowly he drifts into a restless sleep. He stands at the shore again, the sun hidden behind dark omniscient clouds. He can hear screams of pain and agony behind him, man crying out for help or death. The rumor in of the battle numbing his senses. He turns around and his trapped underneath his dead horse in a pile of fragments, blood staining his clothes, dirt slowly descending on him. His mind is racing as realisation kicks in.
    "What have I done? They killed for my selfish dream, for my father's dream. Why? Was it worth it?" Tears flow down his face freely as his heart clenched down painfully.
      "I be sent them to death. All of them. Mike, Nanaba, Hanji... Levi. Levi I am sorry. I regret for not telling you. I love you, I really do."
     Erwin wasn't a man to accept such a feeling towards anyone, not in his position and not after the death of his father, which he could never forget nor forgive himself for, but right there in the battlefield he realised them.

     He was tossing his head around in his sleep muttering and crying. His body was drenched in sweat and his heart raced. His arm moves around and accidentally hits Levi. No words could be made out of his muttering, besides a very few "Levi." "Regret... Not telling" "Love you". He was still asleep, he was still crying. The salty tears mixing with his hair, drenching it in water.
   
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Levi quickly woke up when he was hit by Erwin. His torso shot straight up and he looked around in a panic. There was no one in sight besides Erwin, but he did feel a gentle touch. Levi looked down to see that Erwin's hand slid down to his pelvic region. While his mind was running laps to figure out what he is seeing and feeling, he heard Erwin talking. His name, regrets and love. His stomach felt tight as if his organs were getting squeezed up. It wasn't even painful, it was really pleasant.

"Erwin.."
His voice was soft and gentle, barely a whisper as he didn't want to wake him from his dream.
'Was Hanji right, or was she screwing around? Did Erwin tell Hanji he had feelings like this?'
All these thoughts ran through his head and as he turned to face Erwin. His thoughts couldn't stop of how Erwin looked. He had always seen Erwin as an attractive individual. But being in this situation, he found himself wanting to lean in and kiss him. That strong jaw line and define cheekbones were all places he wanted to kiss. His neck as well, which was thick and hard. His hand gently moved to Erwin's chest and began to touch it. He was as hard as a rock, nearly all muscle. Just the feel of him made Levi's heart race, but there was a down side to this exploration of Erwin's body.

His pants started to tight and it didn't help that Erwin's hand was adding to the pressure.
"Commander..."
He closed his eyes as he let out a hot breath. He wasn't thinking straight all if he called Erwin that. He knew Hanji was the commander now, but still the word came out in the referral to the blond. He shifted closer to the larger man until their bodies touched.
"Forgive me."
He tucked his hand down his pants and looked at Erwin's face for inspiration.