"Leave a message after the beep."
"Hey, it's me, Yoongi..." he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "I promised that I'll call you till you answer or forgive me so here I'm again."
He smiled to himself. There were some minutes of silence till he started talking again.
"Last night I dreamed about you. It's like I can't get you out of my head. You swim your way up through my veins, into my soul until you've reached my brain. Always ended up in my minds and dreams. I always see you in my dreams and a lot of the times I don't want to wake up because I know you're not going to be next to me when I do so. You are the greatest part of me. You were the greatest part of me..."
Yoongi stopped once more. This time he was trying to hold his tears back. Few minutes passed away and he started his monologue again.
"I know that I've fucked everything up but I didn't mean to. I still adore you. I still love you. I don't even think I will ever stop loving you. Right now I need you more than anything. I need your love. I think I'm losing my mind. I think I'm losing myself. Sometimes I see you not even in my dreams. Your scent, shadow, laugh, keep haunting me. You were the one who kept me together. Kept me sane and save. And now... I don't know what I'm doing here anymore. I don't know if I'm still here anymore."
The tears were running down his light skin. It was so hard for him to continue. He took another deep breath.
"Please, let's meet up. I will wait for you in the coffee shop near your house at 3 pm tomorrow. I just want to see your face again. I love you."
It was 3:15 pm. Yoongi was getting more and more nervous. He didn't want to believe that you're not going to show up. He was hoping for you to show up.
The little bell ring when someone opened the coffee shop's door. It was you. Your eyes were all red because of all the cries. You haven't slept a lot either.
Yoongi immediately stood up and waved at you to come where he was. You sat in front of him but wasn't looking at him.
You both sat there in silence. Yoongi wasn't able to took his eyes off of you but you still haven't looked in his side.
"I'm so happy you came" Yoongi said and tried to reach your hand but you immediatly moved it away.
"Don't touch me" you hissed through your teeths and you felt how tears were appearing again in your eyes.
"I'm sorry."
Yoongi closed his eyes and and took a deep breath. His hands clenched on his lap.
"I don't deserve for you to forgive me. I don't deserve anything from you. I've hurted you but I'm really sorry. I'm sorry for everything. For everything you had to go through because of me. But I can't live without you. I can't be myself without you."
You heard how he sniffed his nose and you looked at him. He was looking at his hands, tears running down his face.
"I'm so sorry, love. I broke my promise to never hurt you but here we are now. I've hurted you and now I'm hurting myself..."
You tried to take a look of his hands and you noticed quite a lot of scarss. He was looking at his scars.
"What did you do?" you asked quietly and tears were running down your face too.
"I'm sorry." Yoongi whispered and looked at you. "I'm so sorry."
You both sat there looking at each other, tears running down your faces. This time you were the one who was trying to reach for his hand. You touched Yoongi's hand and shivers ran down his spine. He missed your touch so much. Your fingers slowly ran across his scars. You leaned on and slowly pressed your lips on them. Yoongi closed his eyes. The feeling of your warm lips on his skin was the feeling he missed the most.
"I love you." he whispered and you looked at him.
Yoongi leaned on and kissed you. Without warning, without permission. Without even deciding if he should do it or not. He just did it. He wanted to feel your lips against his again.
After few minutes you broke the kiss.
"I love you." Yoongi said it once more.
He gently touched your cheek and was about to kiss you again but you turned your face.
"I-I don't think I'm ready..." you whispered quietly.
Yoongi moved his hand away from your face. He took your hand in his and intertwined your fingers with his.
"It's okay." he whispered back. "I understand."
He slowly pressed his lips to your hand. You shivered from his touch. You missed his lips on your skin but you weren't sure if you're ready to be with him again. Or if you ever will be ready.
You both sat there in silence. Yoongi kept playing with your fingers. He was enoying feeling your warm skin on his again. He missed all of this. He was happy seeing you again feeling your skin against his.
"I think, I should go."
Yoongi looked at you. The tears were appearing in his eyes again.
"P-please, stay." he whispered and started holding your hand tighter. "Don't leave me again."
You didn't want to make him cry again. You didn't want him to hurt himself again but you couldn't stay with him right now. You needed time.
"I'm sorry, Yoongi."
"Can I at least walk you home?" he asked, eyes not leaving yours.
You nodded and stood up to leave.
The wind was playing with your hair. You and Yoongi walked silently, without any words. The whole time Yoongi was trying to hold your hand but everytime you moved it away. Yoongi was dying inside. He wanted to hold you near him and never let go but you, you were scared that if you forget him, he will hurt you again.
"Don't call me." you said when you finally reached your apartment.
Yoongi was about to say something but you didn't let him.
"I just need time, Yoongi. I need to think about it. About everything."
Yoongi nodded. He took your hand. This time you let him to do this. Feeling his warm hand on your skin made you shiver once more. He took some steps closer. He was right in front of you. You could felt his hot breath against your skin.
"I love you." Yoongi said it again.
Your heart was breaking everytime you hear him saying this. Do you still love him? Is he the one for you? You didn't know or at least you weren't sure. You looked down. You couldn't keep the eye contact with him.
He gently kissed your forehead. He placed his fingers on your chin to make you to look at him again. He leaned on and slowly kissed you. The kiss was full of passion and love. Yoongi deepened the kiss. He placed his other hand on your waist. You wanted to move away but you couldn't. You wanted it but at the same time you were broken.
"I love you." he whispered between the kiss.
He pressed you against your apartment door. His both hands now were on your waist, you tangled your hands around his neck.
After few minutes you broke the kiss to get some air.
"Just say that you still love me." Yoongi breathed out.
His eyes weren't leaving your face. It's like he was trying to find the answer. He was trying to see love in your eyes. Love for him.
Being so close to him was so hard for you. You could felf his whole warm body against yours. His breath near your face, his hands on your waist. It was so much for you. You missed every inch of him, every part of him. But you weren't sure if you still loved him.
"Please." he whispered again. "Just say you love me."
You could see the tears in his eyes. You gently pushed him away.
"I'm sorry." you whispered and unlocked your door.
You left Yoongi standing behind your door. You closed your eyes and sat down on the floor. The tears were streaming down your face.
