The Mortal Instruments: City of Past Ghosts (Book 1)

Chapter 17: By Fire and Light

Chapter 17: By Fire and Light

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The world, to Clary, was a funny, malicious and possibly demented place that was heartless and mental. Bad things happened to good people and the bad are blessed with riches. Ordinary people were involved in horrific, scary things. Young children died. People died in sick, agonizing ways.

But these were things that Clary expected would happen to someone else.

Unfortunately, to somebody, you were always 'someone else'. You couldn't be acquainted to the whole world.

And unfortunately, at this moment, Clary was 'someone else'.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Clary spat. She didn't know what to feel—angry, digusted, scared or horrified. She was feeling a bit of everything. Her blood was pounding in her ears, her breathing harsh, her fist clenched and shaking, her legs feeling weak and boneless, her stomach roiling and her lips were trembling.

Angry and disgusted for what happened to the infants, scared and horrified for herself and Jace.

Jace.

She looked over to see how the blond haired boy who seemed untouchable was reacting.

He was stiff, his face haunted and there was a certain burning look in his eyes. His one free hand was fisted, clenched like Clary, only his hand wasn't shaking. His teeth were gritted, the muscles in his neck working. Slowly, Clary could hear his breathing quicken, growing more and more ragged by the second.

"We should go back to searching the house. No point just standing here. I'm sure there are more things to discover." Simon said, slowly sifting the papers into a stack and putting them into his messenger bag bit by bit.

And as if Simon's words had been a hammer bashing against cracking thin ice, Jace snapped like metal after it was bended too much. The paper that he was still clutching crumpled when his hand clenched tightly. He threw the paper on the bed, running a hand through his hair again and again.

He turned to leave, yelling "Damn all of this! The Angel damn all of this!"

His words had sounded like a desperate plea and cry, stabbing Clary in the heart. He sounded so tortured. He stalked out of the room, leaving a stir of morbid emotions behind him.

"Jace," Clary said, wanting to go after the blond boy. His words put knives in her throat.

"Clary, don't. You wouldn't do anything to help him. You wouldn't understand." Isabelle said. Her voice and words didn't sound mean. They weren't mean. Clary knew what she meant. There were many things Clary didn't understand or remember and going after Jace, trying to console him, wouldn't help. She didn't want to show him her pity too. She knew he wouldn't like it.

Isabelle turned to her brother. "Alec you go after him." she said and whispered something in his ear.

He nodded. "Jace!" Alec shouted, going after his parabatai. Isabelle looked after her brothers, her expression broken. She took a deep shaky breath with her eyes closed before she turned to help Simon with the papers.

Clary watched Alec leave, her heart stuttering in her chest. In that moment, Clary knew that she knew nothing of what Jace was feeling.

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Snap.

Jace recalled the words that Clary said to him after he had told her the story about him when he was a young boy, his falcon and Valentine.