Married to a Monster

Fifteen

Jongdae eyed you as you stood in his doorway, slightly out of breath.

"That was quick," he said gesturing to your ruffled work clothing.

You shook your head, "Yeah, I really want to see Minseok."

Jongdae shut the door behind him lightly and joined you on his porch, "Listen, Minseok has been a mess lately. He's withdrawing off you hard – like he's in love with you, Y/N. He keeps drinking nonstop and spending too much time in his room. It's not like him."

It hurt to hear Jongdae say it out loud since the two of you went the longest time not even discussing the Minseok topic. "I don't know what to do about it," you admitted.

He sighed. "Do you love him, Y/N?" Before you could speak, he stopped you. "No, don't answer that. I know you do. But there is more to it, isn't there? There always is." He groaned. "Why can't anything ever be simple for us?"

Things had never been simple. Hani's departure of the world ensured that. "Jongdae, how is it possible for someone to love two people?"

Jongdae gave you a strange look, "And so history repeats itself," he mumbled to himself while shaking his head. "It's possible in some sick twist of fate and no matter what you decide or do, someone will get hurt."

How many times had it been that someone had talked about this happening once before? Kai loved two people before? But who? How had you not seen it? But Kai had said he loved you... "What do you mean history? Who else had Kai loved?"

Jongdae licked his lips, "That's not my story to tell." He opened the door to the house before you could say anymore and he pushed you inside, "I'm going to be out for a few hours and I'll let Kai know you're here with Minseok." He turned to go but he stopped, "Actually, I'm staying at Junmyeon's house. Stay here tonight and hash it out with Minseok... in whatever ways necessary," he gave you a small nod before shutting you inside his house.

Taking off your heels, you slowly crept your way up the cold wooden stairs that led to Jongdae, Minseok, and Baekhyun's rooms. Your heart beat roughly against your chest and you nearly stumbled down the stairs when your phone vibrated violently against your hip. You fumbled for it and your blood started to rush even more when you saw who it was from.

From: Kai

Good luck, I'm rooting for you and Minseok.

Received, 10:03am

Kai.

How could he root for you and Minseok when he loved you?

How could Minseok want you and Kai together when he loved you?

How had you loved two people?

You groaned to yourself. What had you done to get two men to love you? You weren't anything special and you surely weren't anything like your elegant sister Hani who always had men at her side. You were worthless and you didn't deserve anyone's love.

The self-hatred thoughts began to flood your mind and tears welled in your eyes. You hadn't remembered to take your pill this morning and now the demons were coming after you. Depression wasn't easy to wash away and it was reminding you of that.

Overcoming your nerves, you rushed to Minseok's room. You needed his comfort. His voice could make the demons go away – it always did.

You knocked on his door roughly and you heard him moving around. "Not now Jongdae, I'm not in the mood."

"It's me," you said meekly.

Minseok must have noticed your tone because the door opened almost immediately and he eyed you up and down, "What's wrong? Are you okay?" He instinctively reached out and wrapped an arm around you as you leaned into him.