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Asa | Colton •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
12: 20pm
"Hello! This is the Suicide Hotline, where we try to--"
"Your life story. Tell me."
". . .You couldn't even wait for me to finish my greeting line could you Chicken?"
"Its not very motivational and in fact just hearing it makes me want to kill myself which is the total opposite of what you're supposed to do."
"What do you want Chicken? You know my boss is beginning to think that I'm taking personal calls during work hours."
"Well tell your boss to go and shove it... besides, I'm calling with my credit which is totally your wage or salary or whatever you earn so your boss should be happy."
"Tell that to my boss, who is the meanest woman to ever grace this planet."
"At least you're talking to the awesome-est person to ever grace this planet so that should count for something."
"... awesome-est isn't a real word."
"Once again. It is in my vocab list. And besides you're not denying it which means that you do think I'm awesome."
"I think you're weird and I wasn't going to say it because the last time I said it you said it was a compliment."
"It is! Being weird is awesome because normal is totally overrated."
"Hmm... what do you want Chicken?"
"Why do you call me that?"
"You'll forever remind me of that stupid question you asked about a chicken which is why I call you that."
"Aww. Am I that amazing that you'll remember me forever? I'm flattered, although I shouldn't be surprised."
"You are something else Chicken"
"I know but don't change the subject. Tell me your life story."
"No. You're not that amazing to know my life story"
"Savage. So I have to be even more amazing than I usually am in order to know it?"
"If you put it like that ... well yeah"
"That's not gonna be a problem"
"If you say so."
"Okay so if you're going to call me chicken then I need a nickname for you too."
"...Okaaay, like what?"
"I don't know. Tell me something about yourself so I can gain inspiration."
"Um ... I'm not sure that's appropriate over a suicide hotline"
"Give me your number then."
"I don't know you that well yet"
"Then what the heck do you want woman?!"
"My full name is Asanda and I love the color purple"
"Asanda ... that's a really interesting and unique name"
"Thanks..."
".... I thought you were about to blurt out your life story."
"Too bad huh?"
"Dang it! What you told me still doesn't give me inspiration for your nickname."
"Well that's all I'm giving out, I guess you're going to have to call me by my name."
"Haha! Good one but I'm not falling for it. I will give you a nickname."
"Good luck with that."
"I don't need-- what? Look Asa I'll call you later bye."
"-- Wait what?"
*dial tone*
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