61| the ringing doorbell

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Dear Diary

Perhaps I'm going insane, maybe I'm going mad considering I just called Jamie and told him to come over. What was I thinking? I CALLED JAMIE AND I TOLD HIM TO COME OVER!

I CALLED HIM!

After I told myself several times that I wouldn't talk to him again after what he did. I told him to come over and in a hour or two he would be knocking on my door. It's because of Colton, I've been going crazy over him, worried sick and Carly had not been there to help me and I called the first person who I knew would come running.

I was desperate, I know that. I haven't talked to Colton in so long and the last time we talked scared the crap out of me. I'm so worried and it should be abnormal because I haven't seen the guy's face or met him yet, that level of worry shouldn't be normal and I shouldn't feel so sick with worry.

If it wasn't for Colton, I wasn't going to call Jamie and I wasn't going to be scared about meeting up with him. Although it hasn't been that long since I last saw him, it felt like ages since I did.

I don't know what I was thinking when I called him. Maybe I am as messed up as he says I am, maybe that's why... no, I can't. I promised Carly that I wouldn't belittle myself and here I am, doing the exact same thing I said I wouldn't do.

What the hell is wrong with me?

Why did I have to be so messed up and why did I have to like a guy who could be a pedophile for all I know because I haven't met him yet. Why? So many questions and not enough answers.

Crap. The doorbell is ringing, its him. I should hide, I'm going to hide until he goes away or Carly comes and helps me.

Yours Truly,
Asanda

Yours Truly,Asanda

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Yes. That's right. You're going to meet the legendary Jamie that Carly and Asa have been talking about. Are you ready?


Written: 15 April 2018
Published:06 May 2020

---365 Words---

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