Do I Love You?

Chapter 5- I Was Wrong

Lala

"What bet?," I said confused by his words.

"Huh?"

"What bet?," I asked again, curious to know what he was talking about.

He looked down then up and opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out.

"I uh... I made a bet with my friends to see if I could win you over. I'm sorry."

.....

Now I felt sadder than I was before. Heck, I didn't even know that was possible.

Numerous thoughts came rushing through my mind.

Was I not good enough to be liked by someone.

I guess he didn't really care then. Ha. I don't need him.

Asshole.

Am I just a toy you guys play around with!?

And to think I actually believed him. I'm such an idiot.

Of course, good things never last for me.

I guess it'll always be a sad ending for my story.

I smiled looking at nothing and said more to myself than him. "I knew things were too good to be true, I knew it," then I looked up at him. "What am I to you? Ha, why waste my time asking. You. Don't. Care. It was just a bet after all," the smile slowly vanishing from my face as I kept talking. Instead, it was replaced by a look of pain, anger and sadness. "What is wrong with you, you, you.. asshole," I struggled to find the right words to insult him. "I have feelings you know. Oh right," with a fake smile planted across my face I continued "you don't care about that either.

I walked away heading straight for the field (it was usually empty during lunch) for I knew I was only a few seconds away from tears. But I was too late for as soon as I walked away they rolled down my cheeks. I ran, ran as fast as I could. I hated the thoughts that kept replaying in my mind. Oh how I wish this day never happened.

Ryan

As she walked away I could see how hurt she was by my actions. She was wrong when she said I don't care 'cause for the first time, I actually do. I've never cared about how hurt the other girls were when they found out I played them. I never cared about what they'd do or how they would react and I definitely never gave a damn about how they'd feel. But when it came to her, it was different and I don't know why.

I stood there in the hallway watching her disappear among the crowd. I had a strong feeling to turn her around and explain to her but I had nothing to say. There was no explanation or excuse for what I did. I was wrong.

Lala

When I got home my mom was in the kitchen making dinner.

"Good evening sweetie, how was your day?" she said.

"I don't know. How was yours?" I ask and I'm sure I see a look of sadness flash in her eyes before replaced by a smile. Did she find out about Dad and that so called lady?

"It was okay."

I'd ask why just okay but I left it there and told her I'm going to my room.

As I closed my door my phone sounded a notification. It was another text from Ryan saying "I'm sorry." He's been texting me all day saying things like 'I'm sorry', 'I didn't mean to', 'I was wrong'. I guess he doesn't have an explanation.

I lightly threw my phone on the bed and went to take a shower.

Ryan

"Shit"

It was now night and I had been sending her texts all day but she never replied.

"What's wrong," the girl cuddled up beside me asked as I sat with my elbows on my thighs and my fingers running threw my hair. I was at a party and I was starting to feel irritated and guilty. Irritated at my friend who dragged me here and guilty because I knew I hurt her and I didn't deserve to be having fun right now.

"I messed up." I got up and went out the door. I wasn't gonna stay there while she was hurting.

This time I called her as I walked towards my car.

Ring.

Ring.

Ring.

Ring.

No answer.

I tried again as I sat in my car.

Ring.

Ring.

Ring.

Ring.

No answer.

"Shit" I was upset, and not at anyone but myself. I hit the wheel with the palm of my hand then held on to it with both hands and rested my forehead onto them. I stayed frozen there for a while.

Lifting my head, I started the car and drove, drove until I came upon a house.
I knocked.

"Who is it," a woman asked and I guess it was her mother.

Lala

I was laying on my bed with one hand covering my eyes and the other on my belly. Suddenly my belly growled and I remembered I hadn't ate due to my lack of appetite. But now I was really getting hungry. So I headed downstairs, the door flung open and my eyes widened as I saw him.

What the hell is he doing here!?

Our eyes meet and I look away angered at the sight of him. Just then, my mom turns around and sees me.

"Great you're here. He said he was a friend of yours?" More like a question she asked, wanting me to confirm his statement.

Did I want to talk to him? No. But yet I said "yes." Why did I say that?

"Why are you here so late?"my mom asked.

"I have something I really need to talk to her about," he said but instead of my mom he looked at me, a serious expression across his face.

I think my mom got the memo because she let him in and told us to stay in the living room...where she can see us. I knew she would secretly watch us but that was the least of my worries right now. He shouldn't be here.

I walked away towards the living room but stopped when I realized he wasn't following me. I turned my head to look at him while my body still faced the opposite direction. I decided to not show him how much he hurt me. I didn't want to be weak. I didn't want him to affect me. I couldn't let him affect me.

"Aren't you coming?" I asked in an emotionless voice.

"Yeah, I'm right behind you."