good heart | r.h

• ten •

"Good morning, beautiful." Beth chirps, waltzing in behind the counter as I violently scrub away at a mug. 

"Good morning." I mumble, the words just loud enough for here to hear as I narrow my eyes down at the cup in my hands.

"Another early morning?" She asks, taking notice of the cup of coffee I left out on the counter for her this morning. 

"Yeah, I was already up anyways." I explain, expecting the cup before sliding it back under the counter with the rest.

As I toss the rag away, I could feel her eyes burning into the side of my skull, her lips pursed as she took a sip of her coffee to prevent her from saying anything. I knew she could tell something was up, and that she wanted to ask, but I was grateful she didn't. Sure, I'd tell her some excuse about not sleeping, but I rather not have to recall the memories of last night.

It was something that made me sick to my stomach, made me feel like I was just a toy to him. Used only when he wanted something, then tossed aside when I wasn't needed anymore. I nearly called out today, but I rather be working and keeping myself distracted all day then having to sit on the couch where everything went down.

"You know, one of these days, we ought to have a sleepover." Beth pipes up as I slide onto one of the bar stools.

"That would be fun, but I wouldn't want to invade on your nights off." I say and she simply waves it off.

"It's better then being alone. Besides, you'd be able to finally meet Andrew." She gushes as she talks about her boy. 

I give her a small smile, thinking about the chubby baby I've seen so many pictures of. There was nothing I wanted more growing up then having a family, but I knew that wasn't realistic being with Grayson. He made it clear, back when his career was finally taking off, that kids would only get in the way. 

For a while, I was upset by the fact he didn't want to a raise a family with me. But now that I've gotten older, I'm thankful that my children didn't have to live through what I'm going through, that they didn't have to know Daddy as some monster.

"Good morning, girls." Carol sighs, walking through the front door with Dan trailing close behind her.

"Late this morning, I see." Beth jokes, causing me to chuckles slightly as Dan merely rolls his eyes.

"Blame this one for taking the longest shower." Dan says, pointing an accusing at Carol, who scoffs in response.

"Says the one who wanted a full course meal this morning." Carol shoots back, to which Dan merely sticks out his tongue as he walks into the back room.

"You two are adorable." Beth chuckles as Carol places her purse onto the counter, glaring at the door Dan went through.

"I'm adorable, he's a pain in my butt."

• • •  

As my day went on, I began to slowly regret coming into the work today. I was physically emotionally drained, practically dragging my feet to each and every table I served. The stares and unwanted compliments from the older men that walked into diner wouldn't usually bother me on any other day, but their words today just made my skin crawl.

By the time Ryan had walked into the diner, taking his seat by the bay window, I could feel my anxiety bubbling up in my chest, about to boil over.

"Good morning, Ryan." I sigh, slipping his menu across the table as he gives me a warm smile in return.

"Morning, Lynn. How's your day going so far?" He asks and I chuckle slightly, running a hand through my hair for what it feels like the hundredth time today.