Saving Him

Chapter 21

Chapter 21

When you are born, your pure and white. You've done nothing bad, you've said nothing bad. No regreats on your heart and no worries on your shoulders. You start off clean and fresh like a blank piece of paper. But when you grow older you exprience love, fear, lost, hatred. You get hurt over and over again. Everytime you get hurt, that blank piece of paper gets crumbled a little. More and more you get hurt and more and more this piece of paper gets crumbled. And no matter how hard you try to flatten out this piece of paper, there are creases in the paper where it was crumbled. So in life, you get hurt over and over again, and even when it gets better you still have scars that will never leave you.

So as I pick at my plate of salad, I'm lost in thought. Going over and over what had happened and realizing that this will never leave me. Even when all this blows over, it will still haunt my thoughts and dreams, it will never end.

"Grace?" Jax called my name and I looked at him in surprise.

"What's wrong?" I asked.

He had that look in his eyes like he was going to break down. I looked across the table and Fred, Alex and Zeke. They were caught up in their own conversation, they wouldn't notice if we left.

"C'mon." I murmered to Jax and pulled him up while standing.

"Where ya guys going?" Alex asked.

"I'm not feeling well." Jax mumbled and pulled me away from the table. I sent them an small smile before following behind Jax.

We made to the stairwell before Jax turned and looked at me.

"I'm sorry." He said.

"For what?" I asked him, concern clear in my voice.

"For wanting to break down and wanting to bawl." He said.

"Hey," I said, placing a hand on his cheek. "Don't be. I want to as well."

"I love you." He said. I smiled at him.

"I love you." I said. He smiled at me, leaning down and kissing me.

"Lets go, watch something." He suggested.

"Okay." I agreed and we went up to the third floor, we walked up to the third floor.

I unlocked my room door, and we slided in.

Jax zombie walked over to my bed and collasped down. I almost wanted to laugh because he looked so cute.

"Jax?" I laughed, he turned and looked up to me. He smirked at me before grabbing my hand and pulling me down on the bed next to him.

"What are you doing?" I gigled as he bear hugged me so hard I could barely breathe.

"I'm snuggling." He said.

"Well, I kinda have to be alive to snuggle." I said and he snickered, losening his grip on me. I turned around and looked at him.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked him.

"Lots of stuff." He mumbled, closing his eyes.

"Lots of stuff woud be?" I asked, curious.

"How much I love you." He said, making me smile. I had to bit my lip to stop myself from yelling 'AWE'.

"What else?" I asked. Jax sighed and placed a hand on my cheek.

"How nice it would be if all this shitty stuff stopped." He said.

"Yeah, I've never really believed in a 'God', but I find myself praying every night for all this stuff to stop." I admitted.