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reflection —
Sitting here, on this chair, alone in the back room, with only a radio as entertainment was boring.
I was not the type to grow impatient and fall asleep out of boredom but being here eight hours daily was a waste of time.
I had great passion for finding answers, doing something with my life and help others out of daily struggles and trials. But sitting here, in a mack, trying my best, acting my nicest, eating least of everyone and still being treated like shit by customers and fellow workers, was not the way.
I knew it myself. But growing up in this korean hell with an alcoholic father and abusing grandfather made me have no other chance then running away, spending all my youth on working and getting money to be able to at least have roof over my head and food to survive the day was what I was fighting against.
So, sitting here, half asleep while listening to some random rich korean dude talking about five entertaining things to do in Seoul was better than nothing.
"Namjoon-ahhh~"
I heard my so called friend mewl as I opened my eyes and looked at him. I just blankly stared at him.
"Can you lend me some money?"
My eyes widened as I scoffed in disbelief. I stood up from my chair.
"No."
I heard a customer ring the bell as I thanked whatever might be in the skies as I threw the cola flavoured lollipop, aiming at the trash can but obviously failing to set a score.
I felt my friend's glare at me as I just shrugged him off. He was a boy with no empathy. Despite knowing my hard work and struggles, the dude kept on asking for money. Daily.
I just was tired of him. I smiled at the customer who seemed the opposite, eyeing me angrily.
"Yes sir, so do you want a car wash or just refil-"
"You pieces of shit can't even give custom service like others. Don't make me get too mad and start the refill!"
He slapped back at my face as I had a hard time still smiling. I nodded my head as I shakily went to the petrol, trying my best to pick it up.
With my mind being absent and my fingers trying their best to make me even more mad, I harshly put the petrol against his car, starting the refill.
I took small glances at the man who was observing my every move with a knitted eyebrow and furrowed forehead. His car was really luxurious and so was his clothes, looking like they were from gucci. Stupid rich people. Dressing nicely but acting the opposite.
"so, that's 20-"
"I never pay. I fucking pay for you all to work so don't you dare telling me to pay!"
I was cut off as I maintained smiling.
"Sir, you need to pa–"
I got cut of twice, this time by his money being thrown at my face.
"Stupid poor idiots. Always hungry for money. Go to hell with you all"
He said as he started his engine and drove off. I just bent myself and picked up the money as I let out a sigh.
No fucking humanity in this stupid planet.
I went inside as I noticed the same friend now sitting down on my chair and talking on his phone. He smiled when he saw me and hung up.
He stood up from the chair and went against me.
"My shift just ended anddd-"
He took the money out of my grasp.
"-thank you!"
"NO, you can't–"
"–bye hyung~"
I slammed my knuckle against the wall as I frowned, obviously pissed of. I observed my reflection in the window, noticing how exhausted I looked. I really didn't want to do this any longer.
Could I possibly just get some time alone if I left now?
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fourth chapter! I personally relate to Namjoon in this story a lot. I also feel like I do the same thing everyday and I've grown tired of it. And having the goal to make a difference and achieve something from this life makes it hard for me. Anyways, hope you enjoyed it<3
