Blue Wrists

Seventeen

PoV: Yoongi
"Jimin... Do you have cigarettes ?" I ask.
I really need some tobacco right now. Probably he doesn't even smoke so why do I ask?

Jimins eyes widden.

"Huh..? You smoke??" He asks confused.

"You didn't know?"

He shakes his head.

"Yoongi no, that is not good for you. You better sto-" I cut him off

"-It is. Tobacco really helps me to calm down and feel more.. alive I guess"

"What the.." Then he sighs. "Guess it won't help to tell you to stop... Why exactly do you need to smoke? You didn't smoke the past few days.." His expressions turns worried.

"As you already said, I'm stressed. I don't feel comfortable around people and .. I dont know, it's been a while the last time I smoked so I kinda want to. I have derealisation... Everything around me seems like a dream, but cigarettes help me through that." I explain while my headache is getting worse.

"God, really? You should have told me that earlier.. Is there anything I can do for you?? You wanna drink something? Medicine? Should Tae actually leave? He would understand it ..You wanna rest?"

With every single question he asks I feel how something inside my body twists.

"No!" I say embarrassed and push him further away since he was holding onto my shoulders.

"Stop being so kind. Just stop ! I don't need anything." I say while covering my mouth.

Okay Yoongi, you just overreacted.
What the fuck should I say? Jimin is clearly confused...

"S-Sorry... Let's just go back to Taehyung. He's waiting. I didn't mean to react so weird.." I mumble and scratch my head.

"Don't worry. But tell me if you really feel like dying, okay?" In that moment Jimin takes my hands and smiles gently.
.... My heart.

I nod silently and we head back to the living room, where Taehyung was already playing a solo-round, full with motivation. At least he wasn't waiting.

.
.
.

PoV: Jimin
I'm a little shocked that Yoongi has derealisation.. I heard of that condition before but I never met someone who is living with it... I wonder if he's really alright and if that's the reason be has such a weird personality.. Hopefully I can do something for him, so he won't have to smoke cigarettes..

.
.

"Tae! What the helllll, playing without us huh???" I ask jokingly as we sit down and I punch Tae with my elbow.

"You were taking too long so I-... I tested if it's working !" Tae answers.
Mhm, sure. "Testing" doesn't mean to level the character up to lvl4 within 10 minutes. Whatever, I just roll my eyes, noticing that Yoongi is smiling at this situation.

And oh my god- We are still holding hands. What shall I do ? Let go? I don't want to ;w;
But if I won't let go we can't play the game-

"Oh s-sorry.." Yoongi apologizes quietly after he sees it too. He immediately lets go and looks away.

I just nod and make an 'its okay~' gesture with my hand.

"Okay, let's start playing a death match!!" Tae hands us the other two controllers and starts the real game.. Hopefully it'll be fun as always.

.
.
.

"I wwoooonn~!!! Yaass! Nobody can beat me, duuhh!" Tae shouts and celebrates.

First we had to show and explain Yoongi how this whole game works, and he quickly got into it, but he always lost. Surprisingly he's upset about that, his pouting face says everything. It's so adorable.