indecisive (on hold)

21.

Harry’s POV

Liz falls asleep for about five minutes before I wake her up.  Don’t get me wrong, I love watching her in her most peaceful state, but I’d rather hear her voice. I stir her by calling her name softly. I end up having to tickle her and kiss all over her face. She nags in, playfully, about waking her, but I just silence her with my laughter. We ended up talking about everything. I still couldn’t believe this was happening.

Elizabeth Rose Winters is my girlfriend. I finally accepted the feelings I had for her, and she had them for me too. It was all surreal. I am her boyfriend. At first, she was so scared of me. Every time she saw me, she would stiffen and avoid my gaze. Granted, the first time we met, I had seen her cuts. If I met someone for the first time like that, then kept seeing them everywhere, I’d be nervous too. I remember what I was thinking when I saw them. "Are those…? What would make her do this to herself? Is she okay? Obviously not."

I remember how I felt the familiar sting on my arm. The burn. The aching when you stretched the skin. I remember wanting to throw the pizza and come inside. To talk to her. She looked so horrified when I had seen them. I would’ve been too. I remember sitting in my car, staring at her building, wondering what she was doing. I had spent all night thinking about how red her cuts were. They looked deep, much like mine used to.

“Harry.” Her voice says sharply. I snap my head to look at her.

“Yeah?” I ask, my memories are still buzzing around.

“What are you thinking about?” She sits up and turns her body to face me. I follow her, sitting up.

“You.”

She looks down at the sheets. Why does she look away every time I say something about her?

“Why are you thinking about that?”

I clench my jaw at her choice of words. “One, you are not a that. You are an amazingly beautiful human being, who needs to learn to understand that. Two, because it seems you are the only thing on my mind. Ever.”

She chuckles. “You’re ridiculous.”

I shake my head at her and wrap my arms round her waist. I pull her to lay back down with me. She rests her head on my chest, her arm is across my torso. I feel the comfort of her body. I instinctively wrap both my arms around her waist. The thought of cuddling used to scare me. It made me uncomfortable, but now I see that it is one of the best feelings ever. The weight of another on or around you, their heat radiating to yours. I have been missing out.  Technically, we have only been together, not even, one day. However, the week we had met and the first week of college showed how comfortable we were together. It is just a label. "Boyfriend and girlfriend" shouldn't define how close you and your partner were, and I guess I liked that I understood that.

“Harry,” She again, snaps me out of my thoughts. “Tell me about yourself.”

“What would you like to know, love?” I’ll tell her almost anything. Almost.

“Personal things.” She smiles up at me. She begins asking me the basic questions, which I happily answer.

Liz’s POV

Harry answers my questions with ease. His birthday is February 1st. His middle name is Edward. He was born in Bromsgrove, Worcestershire, England and he grew up in Holmes Chapel. His favorite colors are blue and orange. He adores animals and I laugh when he talks about his favorites. However, he hates snakes with a burning passion. His favorite TV show is Family Guy. His favorite thing to read is Romeo and Juliet.  His favorite singer is Ed Sheeran, I totally agree. His favorite subject in school was writing. His favorite food is tacos and his first tattoo was the outline of the star on his under left bicep.

My next questions are a little odder, but I feel like these help me know him better. “What is your favorite day, month and season?”

He runs his fingers up and down my arm, making goosebumps rise. “Saturday, February and summer.” His voice is slow. We have all day.

“What is your favorite sound?” I look up at him and his eyes are already on me.

“Guitar.”

I watch the way his lips move as words fly off his tongue. His favorite thing to do on a Saturday is watch movies. His favorite thing to do on a Sunday is read. His favorite body part is his hands, which are massive. We test how big they are and they cover my entire face. If he had to chose between a road trip and an airplane, he would chose a road trip. His first word was “cat” and then he moves on to make a joke about how much he loves pussy.  I swat him for being inappropriate. He talks about his favorite memories, which was when his school did a play on Shakespeare and Harry got to play Romeo. His worst memory, he stiffens. He chooses to ignore that question and I nod.  He talks about his favorite weather, which is sunny with a few clouds in the sky and a breeze. I ask him, it seems, a million more questions.

“Lizzzzz” He complains, dragging the 'z' in my nickname.

“Okay, okay. Last one.” I beg.

“Fine, what is it?” He groans, with humor in his voice.

“What do you love most in the world?”

I catch him off guard. He sits up and stares at me.  His eyes are sparkling as I stare deeply into them. They look like they are holding something back. Maybe he didn't love much in this world. It was hard to. This world was cruel and against you in every way possible. I feel like I can see all the pain he has endured, but it looks like they are holding back something more..

“Breathing.” It’s his turn to catch me off guard. He snaps me from my thoughts with his answer.

“Breathing?” I confirm and he nods. “Why?”

“You said last question,” he points out, smirking.

“Well you need to answer this one,” I fight back.

“Nope, you said.” He teases and I murder him with my eyes.  "Breathing". His favorite thing in the world is breathing. I don’t what I was expecting, but I wasn’t expecting that.  He sees me ponder off all the possible explanations.

“Liz.” He rubs his thumb along my jaw. “Stop thinking about it and come here.”

He opens his arms and pulls my body completely on top of his. I sit on his lap. He pulls down my shirt sleeve. I freeze. What is he doing? I soon feel the outline of his lips against my shoulder blade. I smile and relax.  I look at the clock. It is around four. Already? I hear my stomach growl and Harry chuckle deeply.

“Hungry, love?” He smirks against my skin.

“Yes.” I giggle because he heard my stomach groan, craving food.

“Me too. Let’s go get some food.” He chuckles, lifting his body and pulling me with him.